Just how easy it is to forget the myriad of blessings we’re surrounded with.
I merely arrived home from an odd job of cleaning dorm rooms, only to realize that I got paid more for 7 hours of work than most people in my home country after a whole week of full-time labor.
The catch? There isn’t one.
It wasn’t even hard, let alone mundane or dull.
“How is this even possible?” – I asked myself, as I landed on the couch to witness another miracle of the Dutch culture:
My friend carefully opened a tiny wooden treasure chest, filled with the essential toolkit to craft a friendly evening: Paper, crutch, tobacco and the famous combo of weed & hash.
Steel grinder ready at his left, like a revolver waiting to bleed smoke the second it’s drawn to the hand.
With a lighter already on his lap, he began sprinkling a layer of tabak1, followed by crumbles of weed, and a touch of hash.
– “Do you want to come?” – He asked, as he gently licked the glue with the edge of his tongue
“Yeah, man!”
I didn’t need to be convinced.
It was a long day, and I didn’t mind doing something (potentially) stupid.
He nodded, and made that notorious joint sealing twitch.
In a minute another J was on the way, and I was neither surprised, nor disappointed in his ability to prepare properly.
Before we would leave, my huisgenoot2 served us a heavenly meal, garnished with fine fish, potatoes & greens as a side dish, mixed with spices that make you suck on all of your fingertips.
To put the icing on the cake, I devoured a bag of sweets, using sugar to satisfy my cravings and to tank up for the upcoming trip.
Midnight Apes
We headed out to “climb”. That was our aim.
To turn into monkeys and remove the shackles of modern life a bit; answering the seductive call of uncivilized living.
It took little to no effort to find a place where we could fool around and uncage our inner apes, feeling like the coolest 14-year-olds in the city. That feeling was certainly not diminished by the fact that our first stop was a schoolyard, with walls just high enough to call jumping around #hardcoreparkour.
I believe there is an agile Spiderman flowing in everyone’s veins, but for some people the degree of those genes is so minute, that they would rather turn into loan sharks who sell money for a living.
Have you ever seen a banker run around, jump or climb in his leather shoes and 6-piece suit?
They don’t know what they miss out on.
As a tip though, once you look at the world through the lens of “how I can do sick stunts without breaking my bones”, it becomes surprisingly easy to find the sweet spot between the edge of your comfort zone and your ability to do something cool.
(Isn’t that how it is with everything, though?)
When we warmed up well enough after playing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for 20 minutes, there was a spark of inspiration to race to the roof of the building, but the security cameras kept our inner troublemakers at bay.
“Let’s go climb a tree!” – my friend exclaimed.
The truth is, just like how money doesn’t grow on trees, trees that can be climbed don’t grow on trees either.
There was, however, one tree “not so far away” that was perfectly fit for conquering its peak.
Or so my friend claimed.
Without a gram of disbelief, we began strolling towards the forest on a well-lit road, with a just lit joint, drifting from hand to hand, as we were kissing smoke in the air.
The walk wasn’t long enough to make it a topic of complaint, we quickly reached the edge of modernity, as pure darkness greeted us at the entrance of the sea of trees. There were no street lights anywhere in the observable distance, and the branches were filtering out even the dimmest lights shining from the heavens.
The only thing you could see was the very end of the joint, dully lit, sparkling in cool orange as the blazing ash was making its way towards the tip.
The darkness absorbed everything, leaving nothing to the eye, except that small drop of flame that kept wandering from one’s mouth to the firm grip of another’s fingertips.
It felt strange to be embraced by the shadows, deep in the evening with no fear.
Is it my fantasy that died, or my beliefs?
As a kid the dark seemed frightening, governed by ghosts and monsters whose sole purpose is to catch you and dismember your body (if you were not quick enough to reach the safe haven under the blanket’s magical field of immunity)
Now it was just us and the deep silence of a forest, the sky covered in darkness, with the occasional glimmer of dim stars standing out like a Dutchman in an Asian land.
By now, we’ve walked quite a distance – left, right, across and back.
Straightforward was our direction at the moment.
– “We are nearby”
– “We are almost there”
– “I think I know where we are” – such sentences were raining every three minutes, just like Shrek’s Donkey, but in reverse – are we there yet?
Somewhere along the way our ‘pathfinder’ even picked up a long wooden branch to make the hiker guide experience slightly more authentic.
After the 8th or 9th time we’ve heard how ‘close’ we are to that mysterious tree in the middle of a roadless forest, it sounded more and more like we’re being led to a place from which we’ll only leave in a body bag and multiple pieces.
It didn’t help that he started slapping that thick log in his hands, with a satisfied smirk and thirsty eyes as a reaction to the serial killer jokes we cracked.
“It’s right around here, somewhere”
– Alright, for every time he says that, we get €1 as a payment” – I attempted to capitalize on this nonsense
“Okay, but then it counts from now on!” – he countered.
You bet your ass he didn’t open his mouth again.
It seemed like we’d never find that mythical tree with the perfect composition of branches.
A couple of minutes passed by in silence, as we walked around between the bushes, with no beaten path anywhere close to lead us out from the forest.
– “Áh, I know éxáctly where we are!” – he said for the 11th time, but this time with a certain kind of confidence that makes you believe every word he says.
In less than 30 seconds he stopped in the middle of a road, comfortably placed his hands on his waist and said:
“Gentlemen, we are here!”
We actually were.
At this point we were already high in our heads, so it was only proper if we did our best to physically achieve that state as well.
With a well-placed stone and angled flashlights oozing from our phones’ back, we could see the first ~10 meters of climbing path of the renowned tree we were searching all evening.
It was a spectacle indeed – breathtaking, even.
Man, was that tree gorgeous in every aspect. The branches were growing straight away from the trunk, thick and firm to hold our weight, with more than enough space to smoothly climb between them. This perfect spread of space and strength characterized every inch of bark and branch, all the way to the very top – which was still covered in darkness, revealed only to those who were brave enough to get there.
That piece of royal electric pole was born to be climbed, without a doubt.
My ape blood began boiling like the jacuzzies in hell, making me jump from branch to branch like a squirrel.
One foot after the other, I climbed higher and higher. I felt the invitation pulsing from the highest branches, calling me like the sweet songs of Sirens.
Though we smoked a joint under the way here, I did not forget about the most important rule of climbing anything without a safety rope attached:
Always have at least 3 solid points of contact firmly rooted as you ascend.
You never make a step with 2 loose limbs in the climbing process. At least 3, no less.
I remember looking down after climbing for 5 minutes. My friends were barely visible in a thin veil of light spreading from the flashes, filtered by an army of branches.
– You know, it’s better that we do it at night, actually – you can’t see the bottom, so you can’t get scared from how much you could fall from here.
Both of them agreed, though they were quite a few meters below me.
I climbed for another 3 minutes, carving out even more distance between them and me.
For a brief second, I looked around and noticed how bright it actually is once the stars are not obscured by the sea of leaves.
I don’t think I realized how high I am, and I’m not talking about smoking.
Luckily the moon illuminated the remainder of the tree, giving me the adrenaline shot to conquer its peak.
I’m not gonna lie, my forearms were burning. Saying that I was grasping for my life would hardly be accurate to describe the force I was clenching my fists with. Every 3-4 meters upwards came with a little safety break to minimize the risk of my tired muscles failing at a crucial branch-switch, leading to injuries from fatal to deadly, as gravity seduces my falling body.
Eventually I was less than 4-6 meters away from reaching the very top of the tree, when I looked around and suddenly froze in disbelief.
– This can’t be real…
I was above every single other tree, as far as my eyes could see.
How tall is this tree? – I asked myself, firmly gripping the branches around me.
The whole forest was visible from here.
All of a sudden I couldn’t climb any higher, the thought was terrifying enough to paralyze me.
If the importance of breathing had been unknown to me, I would’ve started to panic.
After recollecting myself for a brief minute, I told my friends that I’m on the way down, the top is off-limits.
In the meantime, they’ve found a very comfortable place to chill, somewhere around the middle of the tree – with a diminished interest to go any further from here.
While the way upwards was all fun and games, going downwards to meet them was a nightmare. It took double the amount of time and stress to come off than it did to climb it, given that I now knew how long of a falling would await me if I missed.
In about a quarter of an hour I reached them, caught them chilling on two wide branches just high enough to get decent view of the forest.
“It would’ve been pretty bad if someone just came here to take our phones and ran away” – my friend said nonchalantly
Indeed, we couldn’t have done shit. Climbing down took time, even with strength and skill. Eventually all 3 of us managed to get down without any injuries, which was the most important thing.
On landing, we dusted off our clothes and just stood there without saying a thing.
At one point my friend looked up, loudly exhaled, and proudly mentioned how he’s been coming back to this tree ever since he was a kid.
– You have a very… grounded relationship with this tree
“Your friendship has…roots” – added my roommate
“Yep, this apple didn’t fall far from the tree” – concludes my friend, and we start laughing until we run out of tears.
Once we’ve recovered from the pun-induced chuckling, we noticed an open field right next to the road not so far from the tree. A chorus of grasshoppers was playing a symphony, inviting their only audience to witness it. Only a rude hiker would’ve rejected it, so we joined them in the middle of the field and began stargazing to the sound of talented insects singing.
– Holy mother of God, look at this!
I pointed at the tree, now unobscured by the myriad of living logs surrounding it from every direction, except from the field.
– This must be at least… [I started measuring the distance between the ground and the crown] 33 meters, holy shit!
The fact that I was around 28m above the ground was both thrilling and shocking.
It really was the tallest tree the eye could see.
The Crown of the Forest, so to speak.
It took me a few seconds to digest what I’ve done and where I’ve been, but there wasn’t a single spark of regret after it. The moon was still smiling, glowing with a cheeky curve that’s just big enough to light the field.
“Let’s go home?” – the question came
“Yep, let’s call it a day” – we agreed, and my friend lit up the other J.
Lost and Found
“Where are we?” – my roommate was intrigued
“Yes!” – replied our gids3
We had absolutely no idea about which direction would lead back to the city, our GPS was obviously not working, and we were once again covered in the eternal darkness under the endless layers of leaves.
In that very moment, this wasn’t a slightly bit disturbing. I could literally feel a surge of testosterone circulating in my body – perhaps the exercise of climbing and a touch of bravery was enough reason for my brain to release it – making me feel at ease in my mind and confident in my body.
My friend began to truly embody the role of the leader, as he ruthlessly led the way with the thick stock of wood he found earlier. At one point it felt like he was Moses, splitting the sea of trees in the forest.
The funny thing is, he felt so confident on the way back, that he actually found a bright lamp shining in the distance.
At this point, he was either going to be Gandalf the Grey leading us out of the forest, or we’ll stumble into a hidden weed plantation/ecstasy lab guarded by the Chinese mafia with uzis and mondkapjes4.
Either way, our journey will probably end.
As we inched closer and closer, it seemed more and more like the lonely street lamp at the edge of civilization where we came in at the very beginning.
Turns out, we only had to turn twice and we were out of the forest completely.
We cheered, as my friend raised his wooden stock in glory, closing our journey with a flawless victory.
– Let’s keep that stick, and make it a relic! From now on, anyone who climbs that tree will be knighted with it, earning admission to our secret guild! – enthusiasm took over me
They both agreed, until my friend suddenly decided to smash his staff against the concrete the very next minute. It immediately shattered into multiple pieces, making us the only ones left who’ll ever bear the title:
‘The Princes of Pinecones‘
— El fin —
2021.08.11 – Day 933
Writer’s notes:
[NL] Tabak1– Tobacco
[NL] Huisgenoot2– Flatmate
[NL] Gids3 – Guide
[NL] Mondkapjes4 – Mouth masks
Featured image: Angel Oak, Johns Island, South Carolina
“What are you doing tomorrow?”
– Taking a banana for a walk with you.
Plain and honest, just like the Dutch culture requires and expects.
When you send a message like that, you’re likely to cause bewilderment.
Confusion comes before excitement.
Why is that?
It is certainly not a regular idea among humans. You can easily spend a lifetime without ever coming across such a sentence, let alone actually do it the next day. I get that.
But Life won’t magically turn into an exciting adventure by itself. You won’t be able to tell great stories to your children from spending another dry Tuesday afternoon without tapping into the world of remarkable silliness.
It’s that simple. White bread routines seldom lead to thrilling experiences.
Luckily, you can always spice up the dull days with novelty and boldness.
Going out, getting shitfaced, eating at a fancy plek1 – you’ve already done all of them.
It’s time to realize that the world has so much more to offer.
Starting from Scratch
You can easily forge fresh experiences, especially if they are unprecedented.
Creativity does play a role in it, but it’s not the only ingredient.
Like most great events, these blissful moments begin in the form of an idea, your imagination conjures them out of the ether, only to transform them into a seemingly ridiculous plan.
With diligent preparation of the details, you can create wonders. As long as you believe in the ideas you have. As for the backup plan, you can always give spontaneity a chance.
Let’s take taking a banana for a walk as an example.
The requirements of flawlessly executing such a silliness are simple and easy to get.
The fundamentals include:
A Banana – Not too soft, neither too sturdy. Not yellow yet, though neither fully green. The answer lies somewhere in-between
A Rope – Preferably thin, a strong string that can be tied effortlessly
A Marker – Mainly for naming and re-naming if the ground scratches off the ink
Scissors – For adjusting the length of the rope or the string
And last but not least, a slightly outstanding outfit.
This one is optional, though I highly recommend it if you intend to get the most fun out of this journey.
Luckily I already had a marker for this exact purpose, but it took more than an hour of hunting to find appropriate strings. Afterwards, it was just a question of proper bananas and using a pair of scissors the size of my pinkie.
While digging through my wardrobe to pick something neat, I stumbled upon a warm blue sweater depicting Rudolf with actual bells sewn into it. A sudden inspiration took over me to bring a touch of Christmas spirit into the heart of the city. After all, what’s the point of Christmas sweaters if you only get to wear them once a year?
The final step was the store where I carefully picked 2 seemingly flawless Chiquita beauties, and everything was ready.
In the end, the full set looked like this:
Walk your Talk
She didn’t even try to protest when I explained it.
Although she admitted to saying yes without knowing exactly what it means, she wasn’t particularly surprised by the idea and all the absurdity behind it.
“Sure, let’s do it” – the attitude of a free spirit
“I can’t say how long I’m going to do it, but I’m going to try” – she added sincerely.
On the way toward the place where we would begin, we were catching up and chatting about the events passed since our last meeting. I’ve had the opportunity to listen to the story of how the attitude that brought her here today, led her into changing her hair color at a moment’s notice. The hairdresser simply said: “By the way, the dyes are on a korting2” and so did the color of hair turn from cinnamon brown to a blend of deep crimson and burgundy.
Adventurous souls never lack the opportunity to experience great things in a blink.
As we’ve arrived at the outer edge of the city, I could finally prepare our fruits for the trip.
The sky was bright & clear, a rare condition lately. There was a court next to us, full of tall guys eagerly shooting their ball at the ring. You could see each and every forehead gleaming, as the beads of sweat slowly rolled down on their cheeks, making their chins drip.
That’s the way it goes in a country that’s naturally gloomy. People value – and utilize – every drop of sunlight before the clouds gain back their seemingly eternal reign.
I began to measure out the rope and carefully explained the science behind it.
You see, it does matter where you tie the knot and how you hold it while you’re walking.
Put the knot too high or too low and the banana will continuously turn around and stumble.
Hold it too tight or too loose, and it’ll start wobbling instead of smoothly sliding through the street’s floor.
Can you follow? Wonderful.
You’re almost a professional – I’m inclined to give you a degree, but the real test comes when you put it down on the ground and start walking smiling as you do.
After a brief minute of messing around, I eventually managed to tie the knot in the right angle and handed it to her to do the honors. Crazy as it sounds, there is a world of difference between walking with a banana and walking with a banana that has a name.
In the latter, you’re bold and funny, while the former simply makes you look like a lunatic.
She chose “Steeeve” with a couple of e’s and a subtle smile face.
These moments make me question whether coincidences actually exist, since the only other Dutch friend I ever did this with was also called Stevie.
At this point, I was utterly baffled by her ability to stay casual, almost nonchalant at this. It didn’t catch her off-guard, absolutely none of this did.
I quickly finished making my own piece and we were ready to conquer the city.
It was a deliberate decision to start slow, in a place not too busy for overwhelming attention.
Not like it would’ve mattered to her, but it’s better to be sure.
She simply placed it on the ground and started to walk – without a single moment of hesitation or doubt.
The very first Lady I know who dares to do so – in the city? For sure.
In the country? Maybe, who knows.
She might very well be the only woman who has ever done this in the history of the Netherlands.
That’s quite an accomplishment; a hallmark of sincerity and boldness.
It took her a little less than 3 minutes to brush off the name, since it’s not easy to converse meaningfully without losing track of the fruit’s side that faces the bricks.
“Noooo, Steeeeve!” – she cries out with a degree of compassion one could only muster for a puppy with a broken limb. I handed her the marker, and we were on the road again in a blink.
The looks we received were confused, and the laughs were genuine.
Every once in a while her laugh was louder than the person’s whose reaction triggered it.
By now we were well within the busier parts of the city, enough to get a grasp on the feeling, so I asked:
– How would you describe it?
“Amazingly weird!” – she said after a moment of thinking
Capturing the very essence of the idea behind this.
We were dragging the bananas around for a good 30 minutes in a park when a Shaman-looking man expressed his curiosity with an accent thicker than the wallet of a fresh lottery winner. That was the first and last conversation of the day, since her rope snapped not a minute after the thought exchange.
That marked the end of the journey of Bobo and Steeeve.
It was still early, so she offered to roll a J, both to chill and to celebrate, but it was my 30th day of a 30-day break. Saying yes would’ve been great, but it would’ve cost me my integrity.
After all, how could I aspire to achieve anything if I can’t keep my own promise?
“Word is bond” as they say, and keeping your word can only lead to a healthier sense of self-esteem.
There are only a handful of qualities in Life that keep us on track toward our dreams, and self-esteem is one that we simply cannot afford to lose or miss.
To our greatest delight, we’ve found an empty and quiet place on top of a bastion with a brilliant view over the city and the park beneath it, without the usual army of drunkards and junkies. The wind didn’t make it easier for her to roll her J, but the sun was bright and the sky was clear – that made up for the breeze.
Her pale silver eyes were relaxed, content and at ease, as if the definition of stress was missing from her vocabulary.
You could almost smell the openness she approached the world with. It was fresh, like the scent of grass after a light rainfall in the spring. Such is the wonder of organic curiosity.
Both the mood and the scenery – sunbathing on top of a tower in the heart of the city – were perfectly suited for a discussion with 0 superficiality. Those who’ve met me know that small talks feel like knives in my brain, murdering each and every brain cell. Individually. The amount of empty how are you? -s being thrown around without any interest or meaning behind them is painfully depressing.
That’s why striving to grow into a sparkling conversationalist is always worth it.
In a world of empty words and dry personalities, you’ll become an abundant Oasis.
She took the first hit, stared in the distance thoughtfully, exhaled, and drew the conclusion of the day:
“I think it was around 50-50 of the people who liked it, that’s really good actually”
Though the tiny miracles of today made an excellent mix to turn an afternoon into an evening, the full scale of wonders you can create by taking a banana for a walk in the city was hard to reach. The streets were still quite leeg3, making the world hard to entertain.
Having done this a couple of times, I’m quite certain that almost everybody likes it, but not all of them dare to admit it. Some people can perfectly function within the confinements of society, and doing something out of ordinary (or even agreeing to it) would put their image at risk.
The question we can ask in this case is: What’s worth more, the image itself, or the freedom that comes with not being too attached to it?
When we comfortably settled on the warm bricks at the edge of the building, I asked her the same question, but in a different way:
– What makes you feel alive?
It’s something we rarely – if ever – ask ourselves during our lifelong journey.
Though, if you don’t know the answer, how are you supposed to be fulfilled?
I asked her not to rush it, this isn’t one of those questions where speed matters more than accuracy.
Curiosity wasn’t the only reason behind it, I love this question because it also gives you the opportunity to pirate ideas if you hear something exciting.
We’re all looking for tips and ways to spend our time on Earth more vividly, it would be pointless to deny it.
With little to no surprise, she didn’t point out anything materialistic as the source of happiness and fulfillment that’s lasting. Wealthy people know that spending money seldom remains anything more than a fleeting high you constantly have to replenish.
No, she knew the value of quality connections with other human beings, rich in depth and meaning.
The magic of self-expression in any form, let it be dancing with your whole body, singing out your feelings, or putting your creative thoughts out through art; translating them into reality.
On the way back we passed the city’s red-light district, witnessing a few hookers preying on horny tourists to lure them in. As we reached the last intersection, ready to part ways, I said goodbye and skipped through the zebra crossing like a child with no shame, my sweater happily ringing, and cycled home under the setting sun with the favor of the wind behind me.
May you have the chance, I highly encourage you to spark up a conversation like this with your friends or family – with or without a joint – as it immensely helps you to get a clearer picture of who they are and what makes them feel truly alive or happy.
Have a wonderful day,
Erik
2021.05.18 – Day 848
Bucket List Progress:
– Take a Banana for a Walk with 100 people (#164) [100/3]
Writer’s Notes:
[NL] Plek1 – Spot, Place
[NL] Korting2 – Discount
[NL] Leeg3 – Empty
People will call you crazy for almost anything these days.
Not because you are mentally ill, but because it’s the easiest thing to say.
Just try it and you’ll see.
Do something that’s outside the comfort zone of other people, and you’re suddenly “insane”.
Dare to go against their beliefs, and you’ll soon be rewarded with the title “lunatic”.
Do anything out of ordinary, and you’ll be labeled as the “madman” of society.
No matter what you do, it’ll never fit in with everybody’s definition of sanity.
So why cling to it?
Let your curiosity take you to places you’ve never seen.
That’s what we were about to do today, with a mind that is perfectly sound & sane.
The Snowstorm of the Decade
I asked a friend of mine whether he would like to take a dip in the river that crosses the city.
The temperature was about to go way below 0 degrees, which would make it a lot more challenging.
He politely told me that there was a code-red blizzard on its way to unleash havoc on the entire country, the worst one the Netherlands has seen in the last 10 years.
“Hmm” I said “So we’re cycling”
Such an opportunity is not to be wasted, especially when the conditions are this severe and intense.
At first, he wasn’t convinced.
Cycling through the greatest snowstorm of the decade, in the morning, only to run into the ice cold water as a finish wasn’t the most appealing offer he’s ever received.
It wasn’t impossible, of course, but the idea was indeed crazy.
Yet, when the moment of crucial decision came, he did not hesitate.
After all, who would dare to take on a challenge like this?
Not going would’ve been easy. Taking a car would’ve been easy.
There is no challenge in these.
Cycling, on the other hand, was guaranteed to temper the steel of our spirits.
An obstacle, if conquered, would a make a story that we could tell our kids and grandkids.
So the next morning we decided to make it happen, regardless of how determined Mother Nature’s “no, you won’t” would on our journey.
Bold Against Cold
I woke up with curiosity and lifted my curtain to peer out the window.
The only thing I could see was the blinding white color of endless snow.
Covering the cars, the ground, the roofs.
A cold blanket coating everything from head to toe.
The wind was blowing with such a momentum, that the snowflakes were falling parallel to the ground.
Looking up, the only thing you could see was the pale gray sky, sprinkling its frozen drops, like an untrained cook who doesn’t know when to stop.
“You up?” – he asked, sharp 7:30 on the clock.
I was very much awake, eager to step outside and conquer everything nature throws in our way.
We were the only lunatics in the country who would refuse to obey to the power of this calamity.
Before our journey would begin, it seemed like a smart idea to pre-prepare my body. Taking a cold shower, that is. Just in case the effects would last until we get to the beach, so the water outside wouldn’t be as cold as the Reaper’s kiss.
From the comfort of my room, it all looked too easy to accomplish.
My friend even sent me a message, saying that it’s incredibly difficult to cycle with a 30cm thick snow layer under you wheels.
“We can bike through it easily!” – I said, dismissing it.
Only to be confronted with it a minute later, when I tried to move as much as a step without slipping, tipping or losing balance with my fiets1.
It took about half an hour to cycle to the park next to where I live.
Even on rainy days, it takes 10 minutes to walk there.
I was beginning to realize that it’ll take way longer than the usual 15-minute trip to the beach.
On my way toward the park, I stumbled into another brave soul, trying to cycle through the snowstorm. None of us could get any further than half a meter with each push, so we laughed, and wished each other good luck.
There were mountains of snow everywhere, not even the main roads were cleared yet.
Calling it a marvelous mess would’ve been a compliment.
Yet, we’ve already promised to make it happen. We couldn’t turn back.
When I finally made it to the park, my friend was already standing there, calm and ready to conquer.
There wasn’t a single drop of doubt in his eyes. He knew that nothing can stop us from making this happen.
At this moment I didn’t know yet, but the place where we always go to for such occasions was entirely flooded. The river rose so high, the water simply flushed away the small bridge that connected the beach to the city center.
That meant that our only other option was a place next to the cinema, which was an extra 5 kilometers.
The expected travel time went from a few hours to “Did you bring dinner?“
Tokyo Drift
With every passing minute, it became more and more clear that even walking would’ve been safer and quicker for us to get through this.
There wasn’t a single moment in the whole journey where our wheels didn’t try to slip out under our butt cheeks.
It was so slippery, in fact, you couldn’t even stand still.
Since he was leading, I could occasionally enjoy the benefit of being able to follow his tracks that were already carved out by his wheels. We were drifting through the city endlessly, and on top of it, neither of our breaks would do anything, except for more damage.
We thought the hard part would be over if we reached the center of the city; that the roads would be fairly clear from the snow’s captivity.
So, so utterly naïve.
The snowstorm has taken over everything, leaving no routes of escape.
It took a great deal of effort and energy to make it through even the main roads of the city. We were pioneers with our wheels, leaving the very first tracks on the snow-covered bricks.
Those tracks would serve as a route for all the future passengers, making it slightly easier for them to navigate through this messy territory.
At one point, out of nowhere, we saw the light at the end of the tunnel.
A snow plow truck appeared behind one of the corners, heading our way.
I let out a loud scream of joy, lifting my fist in the air, celebrating our hero’s sudden appearance.
We quickly jumped to the side of the road, allowing him pass and toss the snow away.
The moment before he passed, I made a deep bow from my bicycle, hand on the chest, signaling the degree of gratitude I felt for him.
I have never seen a man smile so bright on such a gloomy morning.
It was a great lesson too. Life does occasionally make things easier for you, as long as you don’t quit halfway toward your goal. It took us over an hour to get where we were right now, with at least another hour to go, but our rescue appeared on the exact route we were about to continue on.
We made our way to a big cross section – much quicker than ever before – where we caught a glimpse of a beautiful Audi on the road. They honked at us once, as if we’re supposed to cross, but the lamps were still rood2. They honked again, and once more. Only then did I realize that they were my friend’s friends, on the way toward our meeting point.
“There can’t be much left” I thought.
A bridge, a brief part of a smaller town, and we would finally reach the waters in no time.
When we got to the bridge, Mother Nature’s desire to display her true power was visibly in its prime.
She wouldn’t let us pass without showing her true might. The wind began to blow with such a force, it pushed our bikes towards the edge, non-stop, while the icy snow beneath our feet would try to turn us upside down.
There wasn’t a single moment of peace on that bridge, the wind was unceasing, and forced us to cycle in a 20-degree bend, constantly trying to push the bike away, and out from under our hips.
We couldn’t let it happen – to be forced to walk the distance.
Eventually we made it to the other side without a scratch, and left the dangerous winds behind our backs.
That meant we were almost there.
On the way down from the bridge we noticed a lonely car in the middle of nowhere, standing without movement.
It was stuck, unable to free itself from the ice’s captivity.
“Let’s help ‘em” – we tossed our bikes in the snow and walked there.
When the people in the car realized that we’re there to help, a lady quickly jumped out to aid us in whatever way she can. We tossed a small portion of the snow away from under the wheels, but it was still resting on a small mountain.
Before we’d began pushing, she glanced at the driver, who was calmly holding the steering wheel.
“He is my [driver’s] instructor” – she remarked, a little louder than a whisper.
They were out practicing today, and the instructor himself drove into the pile of snow, condemning it to eternal imprisonment – except for the 2 random lunatics who appeared to change his fortune.
Imagine studying under this guy, learning the tricks and wits of driving.
Certainly not the best way to market your skills.
We made a couple of attempts at pushing the car out of its binding, and by the 4th or 5th, the snow gave in. They were once again free, and we could all go on with our business.
The Test of the Spirit
Little did we know that the hardest part of the journey was just about to begin.
It presented itself in a form of a virgin suburban terrain.
There was absolutely nothing that would make it possible for us to get through the snow sea.
It was deep enough to swallow your boots with each attempt to step through it.
The wheels didn’t stand a chance for a moment of easy roll. We had to push our bicycles, that was our last option.
It required all the remaining effort we had in us to carry ourselves through the snow. The best part is, we were so convinced that at this point of the day we’d be long done, we skipped breakfast for the sake of fasting a little.
I’m not saying we were hungry, but such a draining battle against the elements of nature wasn’t the simplest thing. It took over 30 minutes to make it out of the suburbs covered in snow hills, until we saw the last road that lead us straight to the beach. Victory was near.
On the last 150 meters, for the 637th time, my wheels slipped, and the instinct to gain balance with a kick launched the chains off the cogs in a blink. My hands were too frozen to be able to put them back, so I did the only thing a man could do in a situation like this.
I picked up my bike and kept walking. Ice, snowstorm, wind. Mother Nature was throwing in everything.
It didn’t matter how hard she tried, there was no way we would let her win.
After finally reaching the parking lot of the beach, I left my bike behind to join my friends who were waiting for this moment the entire morning.
A sense of pride flushed over me as we stood there, watching the waves of the deep gray river sway. We made it in spite of everything. Not a single time did we fall or injure ourselves during the drip. Not the slightest bit.
But before we’d take off our clothes and face the greatest challenge of the day, we had to free their car from the snow’s grip. That’s already 2 cars to save, and it was barely the beginning of the morning.
To our greatest delight, our friends had their gorgeous puppy – Goku – cheering for us through the whole thing. Not just in spirit, but with a very affectionate smile and occasional playful jumps at our hips.
The car eventually got out of the trap, and that meant that the time came to put an end to today’s crazy journey. Conquering the freezing waters, that is.
The thought that we were finally doing it made me jump out of my clothes, and onto the frozen beach.
I was jumping up and down out of joy – a strange dance, almost – as my bare feet touched the crunchy layer of chilly snow with each leap.
There was no time and no point to thinking. Stopping at the shore would’ve been sensible, letting the waters gently lick your toes and give a taste of what awaits – but we were waiting for long enough since 7:30, so without hesitation, I walked in and allowed the water to fully take over me.
It was a strange sensation.
The storm was blowing with its full power, but you could barely feel the wind biting on your skin.
It was cold, but not freezing. The water was chilly, but not frosty.
I was expecting sharp pain, numbness in my hands and my feet. Difficulty with breathing. Shaking.
But none of those came to be. Our bodies were unyielding.
Given that we’ve cycled for more than 2 hours, sparing no effort and energy, it was still somewhat unusual to feel this degree of “Invincibility”
I let out a loud scream, mixed with the feelings of satisfaction and bravery. So did my buddy.
In that moment of victory, I knew that every second of today’s struggle was worth it.
Just like with many other things, fighting your way through them doesn’t always make sense until you get to the end of it. This is especially true for learning new things.
Let it be playing the guitar, training martial arts or learning a new language, it can be extremely disheartening to barely see any progress in the beginning. After all the effort you put in; day in, day out, continuously, with very little to show at the end of it.
But one day – likely sooner than you’d think – you’ll wake up, look in the mirror and say:
Thank god I didn’t quit.
PS – Here is the recording:
Epilogue:
“Well, you’ve described how it felt physically, but how did you feel internally?“
It was soul crushingly refreshing. If your mind was a grand chalkboard – full of ideas and feelings, with little to no space for anything new to be written on it – the flow of the river was a sponge, soaked with the cleanest water from a mountain’s peak.
It cleansed you free from all your regrets of the past and future worries.
It linked you to the present moment, a sensation stronger than any sort of peaceful bliss meditation has ever brought me.
There was no reason to come out, really. It was simply delicious, mind-blowing.
It’s an experience I’d recommend to everyone who is ready to try something new and slightly crazy.
“What happened after you came out? Didn’t you freeze?“
Well, my hair did. It started to form icicles and became sharp and rigid.
Only the warmth of the car could thaw my curls back into their natural shape.
When we began drying ourselves in the cold, I tossed my wet underwear on the ground for a brief second to put on another. By the time I pulled on my pants and socks, it was frozen, glued to the floor.
I lifted it in a shape of a solid triangle. Everything around us was frozen in the snowstorm, except us.
To say that we were comfortably warm wouldn’t be true, but it wasn’t unbearable.
After the feat, still slightly cold, my friend came to the conclusion: “Nou, het is wel te doen!“
“Mad respect for you!” another friend of ours remarked, only to conquer the river the very next day. Inspiration goes a long way.
In the end, we decided to leave the bikes behind, since my hands were still too frozen to fix the chains, and it would be absolutely reckless to do another 2-3 hour tour through the city.
We needed breakfast and a warm shower…Immediately.
Luckily the car was there to save us, after we saved him :]
Disclaimer: Don’t do this at home, especially not alone.
If you intend to do so, make sure to gradually train your body in the cold, bring a friend with you and believe that you are capable.
Take care, as always.
Erik
2021.02.07 – Day 748
Writer’s notes:
[NL] Fiets1 – Bicycle
[NL] Rood2 – Red
2020 was not the prettiest year of humanity, we can all agree on that.
The changes we had to adapt to were sharp and sudden, and the impact on our travel plans, career goals or social life was often heavier than we would’ve expected.
If this period caused you to lose momentum, feel stuck, uninspired or unable to figure out what to do next, allow me to share a solution that can turn your Life around.
Over the past couple of months – maybe even a year – I had an unusually hard time finding myself and the things that I’m genuinely interested in.
My favorite activities became dull or annoying. What was once an easy way to put a smile on my face, make me feel relaxed, curious or fulfilled; turned into a chore, and it felt like there was nothing I could do against it. No matter how hard I tried to fight it, they just kept draining more and more energy.
It was an attempt to fill a sieve, trying to sustain habits that no longer sparked joy in me. Sticking to them was in vain, and it didn’t help that I beat myself up for not being able to appreciate what I was doing. Let it be a proper workout, reading a brilliant book or experiencing that blissful state meditation puts you in.
Letting go of these fundamental habits felt like giving away my firstborn child, after my wife spent 9 months of heavy laboring on blessing us by giving Life to this wonderful kid.
It just didn’t feel right to give up these “anchors” that made my life stable and progress further, even if I didn’t (always) enjoy them, because it took way too much time and energy to nurture and develop them into a habit.
But, as the author of my favorite psychology book concluded it:
“Doing more of what doesn’t work doesn’t work.”
– Nathanial Branden, The Six Pillars of Self-esteem
So as 2021 came, it was time for a change.
If you’ve ever encountered monotony, you probably know that it is a silent thief.
It sneaks into your days unnoticed, seeking to steal moments of joy from your most treasured activities.
The lockdowns, curfews and social distancing made it significantly more challenging for many of us to do some of the things we love doing.
With our options limited so severely, the job of our thief has never been so easy.
For this reason, I would like to show you the discovery that caught him off-guard and scared him away, so he can no longer snatch a single mindful minute from any of your precious days.
Though each and every one of us is remarkably unique, I’d like to emphasize that this is a powerful tool that you can come back to anytime throughout your Life, regardless of your age, cultural background or current possibilities.
To summarize it in one sentence, the intention is this:
Explore 1 new idea/activity for 30 days
The fundamental idea behind this is as old and timeless as the universe we’re living in.
We are meant to explore, learn and experience new things. Let it be the beauty of a country, the magic of music or the taste of a chef’s masterpiece. By bringing in color and variety, we infuse our memories with vivid moments and feelings, preventing them from turning dull, grey and unrecallably blurry.
This makes us feel like time is expanding instead of flying, it makes the days feel like weeks, and the months like years, because the things you do stand out from the usual, everyday routines.
Even if you live in great health for a 100 years, it could still be a tragedy, if you couldn’t distinguish a single day, because after all, they all looked the same.
“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”
– Abraham Lincoln
It may sound like a lot of work and responsibility, but it really isn’t, trust me.
We only assume that it would take too much time and effort, but that’s not the case.
In reality, you are the one setting the bar, and you can set it as low as you see fit.
Make it simple and easy to accomplish.
By fully committing yourself to the discovery of a brand new idea, process or hobby, you get to experience it in depth, with that incomparable feeling of liveliness and excitement that takes over you after you encounter a place, a person or a situation you’ve never experienced previously.
You’ll be surprised, but if you only ask yourself “5 minutes of playing the guitar every day”, or “reading 3 pages of an outstanding book every day”, you’ll quickly notice that it’ll be significantly easier to go longer than that, without any extra effort or forced commitment to begin with.
To give you a tangible example of the process, this is what happened after I decided to commit to this discovery:
Being lucky as always, I recently had the fortune to meet a Lady who sparked the flame of inspiration in me to such a degree, that I simply couldn’t resist picking up the guitar and seriously diving into Spanish.
I really love the idea of immersing myself into one project, activity or topic that could be my new favorite hobby, so I decided to pick 3 areas and commit to them for 30 days.
1) Writing (Expression & Creativity)
2) Spanish (Internal/Mental Learning)
3) Guitar (External/Physical Learning)
Looking back on January, I don’t think I’ve ever had such an amount of excitement that made me fly out of bed every morning consistently. Growth-wise, this was definitely one of my best months ever since I exist.
Without further ado, here are the results of this action-packed self-discovery:
Writing
I committed to start every single day with writing. Swallowing the frog, as they say. This is undeniably the most challenging and energy consuming of all three. It requires creativity, attention and (in the best case) the flow state.
Miss any of the 3 ingredients, and your secret sauce will not be complete.
Have all 3, and every single paragraph is going to live up to the greatest potential of your capabilities.
To be honest, I didn’t think the results would show up so quickly.
After the very first week, it already became much, much easier to enter the flow state, almost at will.
By the end of the fourth week, I was able to write for 3 hours straight without any difficulty.
Now it only takes me 5 minutes to get out of bed and start writing.
I simply wake up, drink a glass of water, and the next things I see is that my fingers are dancing on the keyboard, effortlessly.
There is a contrast to this.
In the past, the urge to write about something was rare and brief. It usually came in the evening when I couldn’t sleep, or when I was doing something with somebody that inspired me.
Now it’s literally the first thing I think about in the morning and it’s amazing!
It’s a long lost, wonderful feeling that every writer wants to feel, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
And it only took a month of commitment and consistency.
The bar was, by the way, just to write something. A journal entry, a funny piece, an idea I’ve been entertaining lately. With no time or word limit on any of these. Then guess what, 80% of the time I wrote way more than I ever would’ve expected it.
20 minutes turned into 40, 1 hour turned into 3.
The quality was solid, and during the process I really felt like an artist.
Now, If you’ve been thinking about trying something out lately, here is your chance.
Today is always the best time to begin, at least by planning it in for the upcoming days.
However, if you still need a little convincing, I’m gonna blow your mind with my progress in Spanish.
Spanish
Spanish is passionate, expressive and empowering.
It’s been a long-sought dream of mine, but I’ve always delayed it. I delayed it because I wanted to leave my favorite language as last, so I would have something to look forward to as I study the ones that come before it.
I gave a shot to French last year, but I lacked both the interest to learn and the friends to practice with.
Spanish, on the other hand, was always close to me.
Almost every person I meet assumes that I’m either from Spain or Italy, and whenever I blurt out a few words in Spanish, people around me are astonished how well it fits me.
[Though I still need to speak in front of natives to have that compliment verified officially.]
While I had a small vocab of the most basic words, it’s not significant enough to worth mentioning. In the beginning of January I knew about a 100 or 150 words that were very simple and easy, but when it came to the grasp of the language itself, nor the rules of conjugation neither the structure and grammar was anywhere near clear.
So, I began with expanding my vocabulary, honing my pronunciation and reading in small quantities.
The results were insane.
Before, I couldn’t read, speak or understand basically anything.
By the end of the month, however, I understood about 30% through listening, 50% of the things I read, and my tongue got significantly more fluent when I’m talking.
All this under 30 days, and this is already my 4th language.
Just like with writing, I brought this habit over from January, but now with more variety.
Podcasts, articles, sometimes messaging with my native buddies.
The joy of recognizing words, figuring out meanings, and listening to music without it sounding like complete gibberish is extremely satisfying. I wonder where we’ll be in half a year.
With such speed, I’m confident that fluency in 12 months is well within reach.
And now, allow me to give you the last little nudge that gets you started on this journey.
Let this example be the nugget of inspiration that tips your scale in the favor of deciding to conquer the world of unexplored territories:
Guitar
Let’s be honest, everybody thought about learning to play the guitar at some point over the years.
However cliché, it makes beautiful sounds and it’s undeniably attractive.
It’s a very available hobby. It doesn’t cost a fortune, and there is a lot of material on YouTube to learn from if you don’t feel like paying for teaching. Besides, the house looks way better with a guitar than without it.
From the three projects of January, this was the only one where I had absolutely no previous knowledge or practice. Nada. Niks.
Music – and instruments in general – are such an undiscovered territory for me, that I didn’t even know where to begin.
Plus, I didn’t want to overload myself with new things next to the daily challenges and responsibilities, so I only started really getting into it from the second half of January. By then, writing and learning Spanish were already a solid part of my daily routines.
At first, it was awfully challenging. I wanted to kick it off with some cool melodies that are recognizable for everybody – and are seemingly slow and easy – like Passenger’s ‘let her go’, or the SpongeBob theme song.
After a week of daily practice, I have to admit, it seemed impossible to me that a human being would ever be able to play these. Switching from chord to chord in itself was already utterly demanding. There was simply no way anyone could do these transitions smoothly.
Regardless of these thoughts, however, I had no intention of quitting.
I just decided to lower the bar and pick something easier to begin with.
That’s when finger picking found me.
Through focusing on a specific stroking pattern on the strings, I was able to make sounds that were soothing enough to be called music. It was my first ever experience doing such a thing, and I have to say, it was mind-blowing.
Soon after I could introduce changes in the tunes by adding some chords to it, and practice switching with undisrupted fluency when my patience allowed it.
By the end of January, I was able to play a short melody with barely any mistakes, and to be honest, I’m very very proud of it.
The best part is, now I constantly find myself picking up the guitar multiple times throughout the day, just to mess around with the strings a bit. The main practices where I actually learned something didn’t take longer than 10 to 15 minutes a day, and that was more than enough to progress with it.
Although my fingers had to get used to it in the beginning, we’re still only talking about 2 weeks of practice instead of the 30 days.
Overall, I couldn’t be more satisfied with how quickly it turned from impossible to doable with less than half an hour of commitment a day.
Conclusion
This entire January was, simply put, extremely fulfilling.
After the first 30 days I realized that I have to keep doing this. Exploring new ideas on a monthly basis, chasing experiences and hobbies, so I can find the ones that are making Life more colorful, interesting and satisfying.
Because the habit of writing and learning Spanish is something I certainly want to keep – next to a touch of guitaring when I feel like it – this time I wanted to find something that involves using my whole body.
Can you guess what it is?
Doing Yoga every single day for the next 30 days.
In no more than 6 days, the effects were already astonishing.
I feel a lot more connected to myself and my body, I move more consciously, and the quality of my sleep skyrocketed since I started it. The extra flexibility is just a side-effect that builds up gradually.
I’m very curious where it’ll lead in a couple of weeks, but until then, I’d like to share a few more ideas with you, some alternatives to the ones we’ve already discussed previously.
If any of these sound interesting, give it a shot and see how much you can grow and progress under just 30 days:
- Juggle for 30 days
- Talk to a stranger every day for 30 days (and make them smile!)
- Cook 1 new meal for 30 days
- Practice writing with your non-dominant hand for 30 days
- Make an origami every day for 30 days (Handmade origamis make a perfect gift, since they bring luck to the person you gift it to)
The list could go on endlessly, just allow your creativity to soar and let it surprise you with something that’ll make each and every one of your months feel more colorful and exciting.
Most of these require little to no investment in money, and I’m sure you can carve out as little as 10 to 15 minutes a day to stay consistent and allow yourself to immerse in the discovery of a potential new and thrilling hobby.
You don’t even have to wait for a new month to begin, the calendar has nothing to do with it.
30 days is just a nice even number that gives you enough time to explore your taste.
Whether it’s February 18th or March 6th, it doesn’t change a thing.
If you have your own brilliant idea that you’d like to add to the list, let me know in the comments, so other people can see it, and they might just become inspired by it.
Otherwise, if you found this idea useful, share it with a friend who you think would greatly benefit from it.
I’ll see you very soon with another great article about language learning.
Until that, I wish you a wonderful day and a lot of excitement for the adventure(s) you’re about to take!
Take care,
Erik
“Monotony collapses time, novelty unfolds it”
– Joshua Foer
24 years of age.
The thought of “soon you’ll be closer to 30 than to 20” began to creep up on me.
Not like it changes anything.
Your dreams, friends and qualities remain the same. It’s only the calendar that shifts.
Besides, you never know what the next day might bring in your way.
My birthday was actually on the 18th, but the party was scheduled for today.
There was only one issue with this, is that we are still sitting in the middle of a pandemic, and the government just announced a curfew starting this evening.
Because of this, two options remained:
A) Either everyone leaves way too early, or
B) They become hostages until the next morning.
We agreed on the latter, which translates to the whole crew sleeping at our place.
Luckily our living room carpet is quite comfy.
When my roommate saw me in the morning, he immediately started singing “Laaang zal hij leeeeven” out of the blue, comically.
I didn’t tell him, but that little joke made my entire day.
A friend of ours was already here, so the 3 of us decided to go for a morning swim in the river that crosses the city.
We only had 2 bikes, but issues like these could never stop us when it came to dipping.
There are quite a few up and downhills on the route to the beach, so using my longboard would’ve been exhausting.
That’s where creativity kicks in: If we sandwich my friend between our 2wheelies, he can attach to our shoulders and ride along all the way to the beach.
This was one of the rare moments in history when the idea (theory) worked perfectly in practice.
Everyone who saw us passing smiled or laughed at the way we transported our buddy from A to B.
I wish we could’ve taken a pic, but we were busy staying straight – driving a bike while you’re connected to 2 other human beings is not the easiest task in the morning.
To our greatest delight, the sun was bright and the sky was clear, as if it was already spring.
There was hardly any wind, and the temperature was around 5 degrees. That is considered to be summer after the countless winter dips we did.
The second we arrived, I threw off my clothes and ran in the river without hesitating.
I felt the gentle rays of the sun tickle my face, keeping me warm in the ice-cold water that surrounded every inch of my skin.
As usual, many hikers and passengers stopped by to take pics, ask questions and stand still to watch what’s happening. It’s quite uncommon to see guys rush into the freezing water in an underwear, while everyone else can barely stand the wind in 3 sweaters, a scarf and a winter jacket that has 4 layers sewn in it. (and probably costs a whole week’s worth of laboring)
The sun made it incredibly easy to relax and sink into the feeling. Letting the water invigorate every single part of your body, it fills you up with a feeling of unconquerability.
This was, perhaps, the longest time I’ve ever stayed in.
When I came out, my skin was flushed in a mixture of bright red and pink.
A clear sign that the body is strong and healthy. Some of the small wounds around my fingernails I acquired during guitar practice started to bleed, since all the blood was circulating on the surface, keeping me warm and safe.
It makes you feel like a new person, there is no other way to describe it.
You come out of the ice-cold water, strong and steady, with nothing but energy flowing within.
The person that goes in the water is never the same as the one who comes out of it.
By the time we got home, I felt fresh and ready to dive into another fear: My birthday party.
The pressure of wanting to share a great experience with everybody is one thing, making it happen is another.
To my greatest luck and pleasure, I had a skilled cook to help me out with the dinner.
She picked the recipes, sent me an ingredient list and agreed to be partners in crime at cooking.
Huge, huge relief.
Would I have been able to do it all by myself? Certainly, but the quality would’ve been far away from what she is capable of creating.
She is better in the kitchen than I am at writing, that should give you a hint.
My roommate quickly finished the remaining tasks of renovating, cleaned up, and set up the living room for the evening, while we began preparing the meals that would take too long to do by the time the guests would turn hungry.
The meal plan was the following:
Entry: The Richest Salad in History
Ingredients:
– 2 Mangos
– 2 Avocados
– 1 Cucumber
– 1 Squeezed Lime
– 1 Romaine Lettuce
– 2 Fresh & Sweet Corn Cobs
– Cashew Nuts
– Finely Chopped Julienne Carrot
– Coriander & a Piece of Fresh Ginger
2 Course Main Dish: Sweet Potato Latkes with Sauce & African Curry
Ingredients (Sweet Potato Latkes/Potato Pancakes):
– 1kg Sweet Potatoes (Purple)
– Flour
– Coconut Oil
– Soy yogurt (sauce)
– Fresh Chives (sauce)
– 1 lemon (sauce)
Ingredients (African Curry):
– 3 Green Jalapeño Peppers
– 2 Large Sweet Potatoes (Orange)
– 1 Butternut Squash
– 1 Lemon
– 500g Brown Rice
– 500g Cherry Tomatoes
– 200g Fresh Spinach
– Coconut Milk
– 100% Peanut Butter
– Large Piece of Fresh Ginger & Coriander
Dessert: Cakes (3 kinds) + Banana Ice Cream
Ingredients (Banana Ice Cream)
– [Frozen whole] Bananas (1-1,5/person)
– Soy/Oat Milk
– Peanut Butter
– Dark Chocolate (90%)
– [Frozen] Forest Fruits
The 3 cakes were a gift:
– An apple pie
– A vegan round cake.
– A vegan cheesecake with cherry topping
Excluding the apple pie, everything we made was 100% plant based.
A few years ago I was convinced that it’s impossible to make delicious dinners with nothing but fruits and vegetables, but I was wrong on so many levels.
Though I’m not vegan, my animal product consumption dropped by more than 90% in the past 2 years, leaving that 10% for exploring the delicacies of different countries and enjoying tastes a fully vegan/vegetarian lifestyle wouldn’t allow me.
[Since this isn’t an episode from Gordon Ramsay, the trick to make these beauties will not be revealed]
As the living room slowly got flooded with guest trying to escape the nocturnal fining machines – Police officers roaming the streets to catch people being outside the curfew limit [21:00] – we agreed to test our flexibility with an infamous game from 1966: Twister, the ultimate body-breaker.
Since most of us stretches or does yoga frequently, it was more a question of endurance rather than flexibility.
Training was, too, a daily routine, so the chances of survival and victory were in the hands of fate, so to say.
You could be a 90kg gorilla or small and agile monkey, both body structure had an advantage in certain settings.
Yet, the most important quality was your power of will. A determination to not quit until you win.
This is just as true for Twister as it is for Life, although its effects in the latter are less immediate.
Though I gave my best, I was the first one to fall out from the 4 brave champions who decided to go first.
Each and every one of my limbs were placed in an X, like a dead spider, clutching his legs against his body. Turn it upside down and see if it can stand still. (Highly unlikely)
Right after my elimination from the tournament, I went back to the kitchen to continue attending to the most important duty of the evening: Making sure to supply everyone with what they need.
The clock was closing the last hour of freedom on the street, and one guest was still on his way.
He is, perhaps, the biggest rebel against this whole thing, so risking to get caught just to defy and resists the rules our government imposed on him was nothing unexpected (or foolish) of him.
Right when the clock hit 21:05, our bandit rang the doorbell, seeking the refuge of our police-free place, escaping the claws of the law, and a €90 bill for breaking it. Just the right amount of criminality.
Now our team was full and ready to be filled in the belly.
We jumped back to work with my kitchen fairy, and while I prepared the salad, she literally finished every single other thing.
Long story short, moments after serving the dish, the whole room went silent.
Everyone was eating with their eyes closed, allowing their taste buds to explore every single molecule of the flavors they spooned.
Seeing that they decided not to see, just so they could fully focus on the feeling was the clearest sign of victory.
The next 4 hours were packed with remarks for our Chef-lady:
“If you ever wanna earn money with cooking, let me know and we’ll make you big”
That’s more of a fact than a possibility. Many people can cook meals, but what she makes is magic.
Before the finale would arrive on another round of plates (her home-made cheesecake), I had an announcement to make.
Some of us were eager to jump at the tempting cake, firmly holding a small fork the size of my pinky, waiting for the moment to finally pierce it in the slice of heaven they’ve just received, but first, I had to share this:
It’s been ~14 years since I last organized a party. At the age of 10, approximately.
Back then I wasn’t very popular with people, and they knew it, but there was a deeper fear behind today’s birthday.
On that very day, 14 years ago, my parents bought a lot of delicious snacks from the bakery, stacked up on chips, drinks and my Mom made her famous cake for me. I invited about 17 of my classmates to come and celebrate with me.
On that very day, only 1 person came.
Needless to say, I was so deeply scarred by that experience, that I never dared to organize another birthday party.
Not until today.
My roommate encouraged and supported me from the very beginning, helping me face this childhood fear that haunted me for more than a decade.
Today, on this cold winter evening – with the lockdown, curfew, and corona making it close to impossible to meet friends and celebrate anything – every single person I invited came to celebrate with me, and for this, coming from the bottom of my heart, I couldn’t be more grateful for having a friend circle like this.
It’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of as a kid, and I’m only 24, for fucks sake.
I’ve been living in the Netherlands for only 2 years, most of my friends I’ve known for less than a year – and yet, they came.
Regardless of the curfew, the lockdown, the corona.
True friends still show up.
“Aho!” – They nodded, then their hovering hands smashed into the slice of cake, as the moment to devouring it finally came.
Soon after we prepared the ice cream bowls, while I played a round of chess with the local mastermind who I’ve been trying to outplay for 2 months now. Training, day in and day out, learning about how to put the chess pieces until his king falls down.
It was a very close call this time, there were multiple moments where I was about to take him down, but he always found a way out, as it is expected from a great mind.
After the round, they handed me my gift – a handmade birthday card signed by everybody, special Arabic coffee, and a book of unwritten poems, where I can collect the messages of everyone who decides to share how it makes them feel when they’re around me.
There was, actually, another a gift given by everybody, but it’s still on the way from Greece.
To close the day and the evening, we went another round of battle on the glorious chessboard to give a shot at scoring a victory – starting with the black pieces in this case – and though this duel was just as close as the one we previously played, in the end, he made me resign the game.
It was past 1 am by now, aka. time to sleep.
The clouds were crying softly, hurling tiny raindrops on the ground, mixing the cold evening air with a touch of moisture and tranquility. You couldn’t resist going out for a bit, absorbing the freshest breaths, rich in oxygen and peace. Then, we laid our head on a pillow to time travel to tomorrow.
The next morning began with a sparring session between my buddies, rolling around the carpet, trying to dominate each other with all their limbs.
They celebrated their silliness with a dance, jumping up and down in a circle singing “Pull Up – from Dub FX” with such an energy only physicist could calculate.
Blessed with the sun, once again, we took the opportunity to conquer the river. Everyone was ready in a couple of minutes to cycle to the center, rush in the cold water – naked or in an underwear – and shout with a Life force unknown to men.
It took me over 10 war cries until my voice was fully liberated, making it sound rasp and grounded.
We came out of the water like the champions of the greatest football match, only to be caressed by the sun’s gentlest rays in the chilly winter weather.
I couldn’t have asked for a better birthday, not in any alternate universes.
Against all the obstacles and challenges that arose to make it harder for us to celebrate such an evening, my friends fought with me against each and every one of them, blessing me with their love and friendship that’ll nurture my soul for all eternity.
From the bottom of my heart, thank you for this.
Aho!
2021.01.23 – Day 733
What does it mean to belong?
According to the definition, there are many options.
You can belong to a country, a city or a house.
You can belong to your family, your friends or co-workers.
You can belong to a community, a cult or a religion.
The amount of things we can connect to is exhaustingly long.
So how come some of us can still feel alone, lost or without a home?
If the World was a large puzzle, then every person on Earth is a piece that has a perfect place where they fit in and belong.
But what if you feel like a piece of Lego?
Unable to contribute to the “big picture”; the puzzle everyone is trying to solve.
The World – with or without you – seemingly works on its own, as a whole.
When you spend a Lifetime looking at this issue from the same angle, wondering:
“What went wrong?”
“Why can’t I just be normal?”
“How could I finally live the way I’m supposed to?”
You may miss to realize that there is another side to the story, just like with coins:
You are meant to have these attributes.
These qualities you may call “flaws”, those strengths you consider “unusable”, and all the thoughts you have that are “unconventional” – They are there for a reason, with a purpose you may not yet be aware of.
Do me a favor and look at your hands for a few seconds after reading the following sentence:
You are the only one in the history of the universe who ever had, and will have this exact perspective.
No other person, creature or intelligent microchip can come close to copy the way you see, think and feel.
In the World of puzzles, the pieces make up an image.
Everything is pre-determined – the number of pieces, their exact location and shape – even the picture you get when you finish it.
When it comes to Lego, however, your options to build something are limitless.
Day 1: The Excavation Site
Our little team arrives to the train station of Almelo, awaiting transport to our physical HQ.
This was the first time all of us met outside Zoom, our virtual office and playground.
The impressions were strong.
You could smell passion, warmth and intellect with every breath, even when a person passing us with his dog allowed the puppy to take a big ass crap 7 meters from the main entrance. [The guy was unbothered]
Welcome to Almelo, I guess?
After a 10 minute chat, the vehicles arrived to safely carry us through the city and a portion of muddy farmlands, fully packed with our bags and ourselves.
Upon arrival to our temporary castle, we were greeted with this view:
In less than an hour we discovered and conquered every square meter available for our disposal, filling the kitchen from bottom to the top, along with the comfortable bedrooms and – to our surprise – a basement with a luxurious infra sauna.
Before we would dive into getting to know each other below surface level, we had a toast-lunch with the most delicious bread ever.
It was so good, in fact, that if there was a Nobel-Prize for bakers, the person who made this would get one straight up for the invention.
With our butts fixed and our bellies happy, we were ready to take in the tactical briefing that followed the heavenly dining.
The objective was clear: Let’s use our knowledge and skills collectively to create something amazing.
[+ Have fun, bond as a team and get to know each other better as a side dish]
Such an opportunity must not be taken lightly.
With our intentions set and mental fine-tuning finished, it was time to lift up the curtains and introduce ourselves properly. Not the ordinary way, as you may have already guessed it.
The catch was to tell our story wrapped in a myth; to show who we are by imagining a character who has the same issues, experiences and dreams as we do, but without being “too personal” about it, as we would do with our pre-selected jokes, stories and behaviors we always exhibit in new environments and people in it.
After an hour of brainstorming on how to convey who we are (accurately) through a myth, the time came to step on stage and present it.
With the greatest pleasure, allow me to introduce the Team:
The Word-Bender (aka. The Rabbit)
Countless of tales has been told over the centuries, but only the most remarkable ones remained.
It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.
Even the greatest story is just a gossip if you don’t know how to tell it.
Mozart (aka. The Bird with a Pink Ribbon)
The tongue is an instrument, but only a few can make the words feel like music.
There are stories to be told, where the sentences feel like an orchestra’s flow.
You can compose a song from the most majestic sounds; without harmony, they’re just noise.
The Guardian (aka. The Bear)
Protecting the time frames and structure is crucial.
One does not simply wander off-schedule.
The Flow of Energy – no matter how powerful – scatters to waste if unfocused.
The Architect (aka. The Wolf[ie])
You can have the most brilliant ideas, unless you put them on paper, they remain just that.
No thought can change the World without making it tangible first.
Grasping exceptional ideas is hard. Extracting them is Art.
Sensei Splinter (aka. The Knight who Fucks Up Teachers)
Though we are not Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles anymore, wisdom is required.
There are pitfalls to avoid, strategies to use and a goal to achieve before the clock runs out.
A great mentor will guide you through a process without telling you what to do, and the outcome will still be marvelous.
The Rookie (aka. The Unicorn)
That’s me. Being the least experienced in the group, paying attention is key.
After all, every senior was once an apprentice.
The Road to Mastery is paved with questions, action and curiosity.
Now that it’s out of the way, we got to dive deep.
Everyone was ready for a long round of Ultimate Marking Brainstorming.
The Knights of the Round Table gathered, placing their sharpest wit in the process of thinking.
Each and every brain present worked like a machine, outperforming all the nuclear powerplants without the risk of another Chernobyl.
With the goal clarified, all we needed are the ideas to be purified.
The sketch of a skeleton plan was up on the board in a blink, followed by muscles, veins, nerves – until our intellectual Frankenstein was one step away from functioning.
Questions were flying around neatly; in order, with barely any interrupting.
Our attention was at its peak, higher than the Mount Everest’s summit.
The discussions sparked our genius in every topic; without becoming too academic.
Such detailed mind-work has never been so ecstatic.
Even in Dutch, I could follow the long string, until around 8 pm, when my batteries were drained.
Translating back and forth every minute has it’s limits. My brain has probably burnt more calories than any marathon runner under the whole year.
I politely asked everyone to give me a 30 minute break in English – and voilà, back to playing the role of a living dictionary.
The whole thing felt like doing a YouTube vlogger gathering in Bali. Talking about content, learning, sharing ideas and skills to help each other grow and spread our message.
After we concluded that the plan was ready for the next day, an unearthly & gezellig dinner was our reward for persevering:
To stamp the end of the day, we cracked open a cold one in the company of an in-depth explanation of the music industry, introducing the challenges and rewards of being a Musician – Creative Creator – or Manager on the field.
To utilize the last drop of brainfuel of the day, our task was to come up with a concept in music.
After all, music isn’t just about the sounds that reach our ears.
It’s an experience with a deeper message, starting from the lyrics, through the looks and artworks around it, all the way to the rhythm and melody – presented in harmony.
The concept I came up with was about challenging social norms; breaking down the rules of society.
It begins with the outfit:
Wearing suit on the upper body, with punk hair – colored to something strong, like neon or pink – a pair of badass biker gloves with spikes and missing fingertips, combined with a diaper as underwear for the lower body, and the largest clown shoe you can find on craigslist.
If you’ve managed to conjure up that imagine, you’re a amazing.
The music would be singing with a guitar under it, but with a twist: Every song would be in a different language, to color the room with the different cultures and unleash a rainbow on everybody.
For the show? “Everyday is Halloween if you’re brave enough” – you are most welcome in the strangest apparel you can assemble from your wardrobe.
Nothing is weird if everybody is as silly as you are.
That idea was so inspiring, it might just become a reality someday.
But for now, it’s time to sleep.
Day 2: Digging Deep
Or keihard aan het mijnen.
The alarm clocks were set for 8 in the morning – if I’m correct –
They did work, the whole house woke up in the exact same minute.
That, though, doesn’t equal getting out of bed.
At about 8:04 when the whole crew was still fighting with the comfort of the warm blanket, our lovely Guardian took matters into his hand by grabbing a wooden spoon and smashing it against a pan, causing a loud row of *klonk* sounds (~42/minute) until people were out of bed.
When the first 40 seconds still didn’t bring the crew to gather in the kitchen, their attempts of soothing the sound with pleading didn’t soften the heart of our man.
“Come and snooze me!” – He said, with a broad smile of a happiest 3rd grader.
Eventually we had no other option but to submit to the plan – we had a schedule to follow, remember? – and assemble downstairs.
Guess what, we were going to take a dip in the nearest river, in the middle of the winter.
Though the thick mist made it look like we’re about to be decapitated by the headless horseman, we bravely slipped through the muddy road until we managed to get to a passage where we could sink and scream without being noticed.
If you’ve ever take a cold shower, you might be familiar with the shock that comes with it.
No skin is prepared for it.
Yet, we were about to face our fears and dive in it.
After a round of Wim Hof breathing, our time came to jump in the water and pretend to enjoy it’s tormenting.
Mozart bravely came in with me without a second thought stopping him.
Slowly all of us made it into the freezing liquid – strengthening our bond and team spirit.
No man left behind – the rules apply to everybody.
It was a glorious moment of brotherhood, until suddenly:
“Laten we even optyfen” – said the Bunny
I’ve never heard him swear before, but now his patience ran thin, politely asking everyone to make their way back to the house as soon as it possibly can be accomplished.
We began running in slippers on the slippery sludge that led back to our fortress, risking falling either on our face or ass. Upon arrival, we were just about to settle in the soothing warmth, when the whiteboard bearing the weight of yesterday’s thoughts fell right onto Mozart’s toe, seemingly with the force of the meteor that killed all the dinos.
At we first we thought: “Nah, a light-ass white board can’t do no harm“
Until we tried to move it from the ground, realizing that it’s either made out of gold, or it was made for a weight lifter world champion.
It was so heavy, it could flatten out a kid, like a fly swatter does with bees.
One wrong move and you’re deleted from society – and it took a big toe as its first casualty.
Right after the dip, we were supposed to enjoy a live meditation session in peace, but the excruciating pain wouldn’t allow our musician’s mind a minute of peace, so he decided to seek comfort elsewhere, until the pain begins to ease.
The rest of us hopped on a spiritual airplane to travel to a land of creativity, allowing us to get in the flow of producing quality mental property, until we were instructed to gently relax our feet.
A wave of giggles took over me, almost instantly, making me think of our freshly wounded mate.
By the time our session was finished, our mind-space was ready to be furnished with solutions, ideas and strategies – if only the toe issue would’ve disappeared.
None of us could work properly, knowing that a crew member is suffering.
Is it broken, bruised or somewhere in-between?
A painkiller has delayed the issue temporarily, until Wolfie took him to the Doctor to get it fixed.
Fortunately, the bone wasn’t damaged, though to the question of
“How strong was the pill, 50mg?“
“Yeah no, 400 actually“
8 times above the Doctor’s estimate.
With such a dose, the Doctor could easily drill a hole in the nail bed, allowing the excess blood to come to the surface and stop the building pressure from growing even further.
By the time our heroes came back, we were fueled up by those heavenly bread slices, ready to work until the late evening.
Though I cannot share any tangible details about the project, the most wonderful part was perhaps that everyone had his own share in the building process.
There was the product itself that had to be invented – it required research, structure and congruence.
It had to be solid in value and unique to conquer in the market.
I’m not saying we started from scratch, but we certainly had to build it up brick by brick with precision and care.
Then, of course, the plan.
A list of necessary steps that lead us from where we are to where we want to get, along with milestones and concrete numbers to see the whole picture – thus the road ahead.
It was polished to the point until we managed to get rid of the pitfalls and blind spots that we would’ve encountered, if not for the mind of our genius planners.
Lastly, the framing.
You could write with the talent of Shakespeare, with the capability of dominating the whole world of literature encompassing all human history – if the book you just finished is never opened by anybody, it’s all in vain.
You have to be clever about how your unveil your masterpiece, and present it in a way that draws the attention of all the eyes and ears that encounter it.
By conveying a message properly, you get to be heard decently – and that’s exactly what you need.
The whole day went by, barely distracted with a few squirrels running around the property. For the rest, our mind was put to work with the dedication and work-ethic of the miners at the famous gold rush of 1848. Our gold fever was hot and heavy, letting no drop of sweat fall without meaning.
At the end of the day, the mining brought no gold, but a diamond of the highest quality.
To let off the steam, we cracked open another row of beers and enrolled on a journey of sharing two personal stories – one that we’re proud of, and one that makes us feel ashamed.
It was my turn to share a lesson I’ve learned over the years, and it felt most authentic to talk about how our egos stop us from building the Life of our Dreams.
The idea behind this exercise was to show – in a safe setting – that our need to be seen as powerful, intelligent, funny (you name it) is stopping many of us from executing on ideas or using our creativity.
Mainly because we’re afraid to damage or image.
There was a twist to this, which was meant to pinpoint out this issue by showing the contrast between the two ends of the scale.
Utter shame, an absolute lack of dignity versus the greatest pride and superiority you can display.
To reveal our egos at play, I asked everyone to pick which one they would like to start.
Either by eating a humble pie or bragging their brains out.
I was blown away by the openness and commitment they started sharing with.
Perhaps, they took it even more seriously than I did, and showing such dedication after a whole day of working is no small feat. Luckily, this was only the warm up to begin with.
In round 2, we were about to perform in a much sillier setting.
At the beginning of the workshop I asked everyone to bring a pair of socks and an underwear as a prerequisite. Without an explanation, they began to assume things I would rather not mention here.
When the time finally came, I politely invited them to pull the socks on their wrists and use their underwear as the most glorious crown of an 11th century King.
The task was simple and easy: Tell the other type of story, just in a slightly different outfit.
Now the questions come into play:
How can you proudly brag and be serious about it, when your socks are endlessly flopping on your hands with every movement you make, while your underwear is hanging in your face?
How can you feel any embarrassment or shame, when you’re already dressed up in such a silly way?
The fact is, none of these change your value, significance or qualities.
You’re just as smart, venerable and worthy as you were 5 minutes before this.
This is idea – if realized – can change your Life profoundly.
It was a spectacle to experience their stories, and a beautiful way to get to know each other more deeply.
The finishing touch of today, along with the rest of evening was, perhaps, the purest form of bonding.
We rolled a J, emptied our beers and played a few rounds of the famous board game: Secret Hitler to see how talented we are at spotting bullshit.
The catch was that Mozart – the only person who knew how to play game – was already hammered by 3 ibuprofen pills. That’s 1200mg at this point, enough to put a horse to sleep.
By the time everybody got the hang of the game, the events were happening “so fast”, at one point his reaction was over 3 seconds late.
“Zware Ibuprofen, he?” [Heavy pill, huh?] – The Guardian remarks in a blink
We all died of laughter, without any delay.
It marked the end of a wonderful and productive day. The best part his, the next morning didn’t have to start with a pan being smashed at 0800.
We survived the military.
Day 3: A Diamond to Polish
“I recommended him to buy a mechanical keyboard, not a fucking disco” – The Architect explains the reason behind Splinter’s keyboard.
We were in the midst of adding the final touches to our artwork, while the constant flashing of rainbow colors made it difficult to exchange epilepsy into focus as a result.
Though our job was done in the early hours, there was one crucial part to be handled before we left our HQ.
A session where we share our feedback, insights and lessons.
Making the event climax in a detailed conclusion.
While I can’t speak for others, being a part of this heavily influenced my vision on the future.
As a Rookie, I tried my best to be useful.
Even if I couldn’t fully contribute to a certain portion of the procedure, due to lack of skill, creativity or comprehension; I made sure to listen, learn and develop as hard as I could.
This involves asking questions – both complicated and simple – every time something was unclear or intricate, and committing to the answer with curiosity and attention at every step.
I deeply appreciate how everyone took the time to patiently share their knowledge, allowing me to get a better grasp on the underlying processes and subjects.
Being a good student is easy; but I can’t say the same about teaching
When it comes to skills where you rely more on creativity or intuition rather than logic, it’s a true challenge to convey the wisdom you’ve gathered over the years; yet each and every one of them did it with ease.
The fact that they spoke Dutch 80% of the time during those 3 days was the perfect way to measure and strengthen my language skills.
This constantly pushed my limits, broadening the edges of my comprehension and overall ability to stay focused for hours and still manage to translate & understand everything.
Achieving this milestone with them in my third language is extremely fulfilling and just as inspiring.
To reciprocate and make use of my hidden skills, I gave a massage to everyone in the team, making sure to ease up and relax everybody after such an action-packed cooperation and fellowship.
A third of the group left right after to get home by the evening, the rest of us remained for a divine salmon dinner before we, too, would part ways.
Though our adventure ended for the time being, there are many more ahead on this lifelong journey.
That’s how these pink pieces found their home after years of searching.
They built it up, brick by brick.
2020.12.15-17 – Day 694-696
Writer’s notes:
– Featured image source: Anna’s Hummingbird
It’s been almost 2 years.
If I had to draw a conclusion based on these 700 days I spent living here, it would be this:
It’s too good here. Living in the Netherlands is just extraordinarily comfy.
That might sound like a blessing, but in many cases it’s actually the opposite.
People are extremely unmotivated, mainly because “they have everything”
They comfortably sit in the middle of the lifestyle scale.
Not having to worry about falling below/giving up on a certain degree of comfort and [Life] quality, nor aiming for (or wanting) bigger things, because what they have is just enough to satisfy their needs.
If you look at this graph, you can clearly see that the Netherlands is the least problematic.
It’s not that Life is perfect here, rather that they’re excellent at eliminating misery.
Hence the lowest score on “Low Life Quality”
And now I am, too, a hostage of this massive ease.
Back in January 2019 – when I moved here from Hungary – I was mesmerized by how easy it is to get anything you need.
Today, I’m used to it. Basically I expect it.
The country spoiled me completely, making me less ambitious, less tolerant and more lazy.
I haven’t even been officially working since last December (1 whole year) and Life is pretty chill.
In Hungary, my friends are forced to work in a full time job and they still can’t save any money.
It’s only 1300 kilometers, yet Life is drastically different.
One of the most impactful conversations I had was with a guy I met in a park during my first foreign trip, a vacation in the Netherlands (2018)
Since I’ve never been on a vacation outside Hungary, everything was new to me. Absolutely everything.
We were chilling in a park in Amsterdam with my friend who invited me, when I asked for a lighter from a couple who was sitting next to me.
When I handed it back, we started chatting and it turns out they were just chilling under the sun after a night out of doing all the drugs you can imagine.
There was, however, one crucial exchange in the conversation that made me very pissed, while simultaneously planting a seed; almost unnoticed:
[Me]: “How many countries you’ve been in?“
[Him]: *starts counting* (…) “I don’t know, around 14. Oh wait! I was also in (…) so around 16 or 17.“
The guy couldn’t even remember how many countries he has seen.
This was my first ever vacation outside Hungary, and both of us were 21 years of age.
1 vs 17.
And I still wouldn’t have been able to make this trip without my friend who invited me.
It was simply “impossible” financially.
In hindsight, that was probably the very first domino in the line that led to the decision (& action!) to move here.
Now it’s been almost 2 years.
One question you might have is:
“How did you survive for 1 year without [officially] working, and still be able to live?“
Let’s jump into it:
£ ¥ € $ Finances: $ € ¥ £
First of all, there are only 3 things I have to pay: Food, Rent and Health Insurance.
The basic necessities of a Western Human being.
I’m sustaining myself by making audio files for interesting Reddit pics.
They will eventually appear in YouTube videos, for which the owner gets ad revenue, then he pays me.
Simple outsourcing. [Look it up if you’d like to sell your time digitally]
It pays for the groceries and a portion of the rent.
Besides that, I
– Polish the Ferraris of a Dutch Millionaire (and sometimes clean & maintain his garden)
– Hunt for jobs, upload and update them in a database and apply for the ones that match the needs of my former Landlord – a programmer from Ukraine (+ cleaning his house when he is too busy)
– Massage Martial Artists and people who do heavy trainings [During Corona it’s not that easy]
These pay for the rest of the rent, allow me to buy small things here and there, and overall keep my head above the water.
The health insurance is basically paid by the government (98%)
Once again, it’s the Netherlands.
I tried applying for jobs to get some extra income and safety, but I didn’t really give my best at sending out as many as I did when I moved here in January.
Just like in the beginning of 2019, every single email came back rejecting me
(Including McDonald’s, I still remember that day.)
Even for the typical evergreen jobs where people come and go every week, like:
– Pizza/Food delivery
– Order Picking
– Cleaning/Dishwashing
No matter how fit I am, or how well I speak the language.
They wouldn’t even give a shot to me.
Quite a shame, but it has its benefits: Freedom & Risks
This reinforces the entrepreneurial way, where you get to focus on building a Life where you don’t depend/rely on anybody financially. You take all the responsibilities into your own hands, which is quite liberating.
On the other hand, of course, It comes with more risk.
To be honest, I know for a fact that I could hardly work on my dreams to cross out items on my Bucket List if I’m bogged down by the tasks and responsibilities of building someone else’s dream.
Since I was raised with Eastern-European living standards, it’s quite easy to satisfy my needs.
Basically: Good food, roof over my head and a good book with tea. Plus a touch of silliness occasionally.
This makes it a lot easier for me to survive with a little amount of money.
The things which we actually need are free for all, or else cheap; nature craves only bread and water. No one is poor according to this standard; when a man has limited his desires within these bounds.
– Lucius Annaeus Seneca
This way I can focus on developing income sources that are either online (I can work on them even if I’m traveling) like writing, or something physical I actually enjoy and pays well, like massaging.
There are 2 huge changes in this topic that happened recently:
1) A Massage Challenge
“Invite 2 people for a massage every day for a month” – An experienced friend of mine told me not so long ago.
This way I get to learn how to initiate more, plan and organize all the appointments to improve my time management, practice massaging more often, broaden my networks, strengthen my friendships and you know, perhaps earn some money.
How come it’s only “perhaps“?
Here comes the trick: Offer a session on a donation basis.
You can’t hit up all your friends and be like:
“Hey, it’s been a while. Come here and spend your money on me.“
It doesn’t work like that.
However, doing them on a donation basis – which means I’ll leave it up to them whether they would like to pay, or how much – there is no pressure from either side, and since it’s only 1 time, no one can exploit that.
I’ve been doing this for two weeks now, with a 90% “Yes” rate.
On the money side: Little to none, but multiple friends offered to redirect the people they know who have pain, so my client base will eventually broaden, and other than that: I had an opportunity to help my friends and catch up with them.
Win – win for everybody, even without gaining anything financially.
2) A Copywriting project
The Wikipedia definition can explain the term if this is the first time you stumble upon it.
Long story short, my roommate got me connected to a group of entrepreneurs who run an advertising agency, and they were looking for a good writer.
After a deeply inspiring conversation, they decided to involve me in some of their projects, helping me out by sharing their extensive knowledge and eventually offering me a place in the team to work with them.
A project popped up that was revolving around public speakers, which is one of my passions as well – so I got the task to write inspiring emails to a famous public speaker’s audience.
Luckily I’m working together with 2 already experienced writers who guide me through the process, plus support me through the pitfalls and challenges of the steep learning curve that writing brings along with itself.
This will eventually turn into a skill that I can apply in the digital world, without being restricted to a location (an office, for example) and bring some coins in, to fund the crazy ideas & dreams I want to accomplish – like eating ice cream in the middle of a desert or taking a banana for a walk with Tim Ferris.
That concludes the financial part of 2020, let’s move on to the Blog topics.
The Blog & Bucket List:
Writing is challenging.
If you’ve ever tried to express a wonderful idea of yours with a pen on paper – or with a keyboard and a word document – you know how difficult it can be to connect the pieces.
Yet, while I’m writing these lines, the letters are basically pouring on my screen without any agony or distress. Mainly because I wanted to address many of these topics already, but I didn’t know how.
In my head the blog was a source and collection of inspiring stories, and I didn’t want to “ruin” this image by writing in a more raw, organic style like this.
How silly. It removes so many barriers and limits that kept me from writing.
As you can see, if you ignore a problem long enough, it’ll keep growing until you can‘t afford to ignore it.
For this reason, there are a couple of important (Bucket List) stories I still haven’t published, even though they are crucial in terms of fulfilling the purpose of the Road to a New Life page.
I managed to cross out #92, #99, progress with #2 and start the long ass journey of #52 and #61
#92 – Explore a Foreign City with Balázs (2020.07.14 – Balázs)
We had a wonderful time in Amsterdam with my close Friend who was my masseur pair in Medical School.
There are notes and paragraphs scribbled down, but I had a hard time finishing them.
Now it’s been 5 months since that happened.
Worst case scenario: I’ll do it again with him in another City and write about that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#99 – Take my Parents on a Vacation in 2020 (2020.08.20 – Dad & Mom)
They spent 10 days in the Netherlands, filled with emotions and experiences that led to a lot of notes, ideas and pictures – I struggled to accurately put everything on paper.
This one is still under development, I pick it up from time to time. Eventually it’ll be published
#2 – Master 5 languages
(Hungarian, English, Dutch [89%], Spanish [Currently Under Progress], French)
My Dutch improved a lot, due to a challenge of speaking Dutch for a whole month – and doing everything I can to avoid using English – + journaling in it.
Journaling in a different language is an incredibly powerful tool that teaches you how to express the thoughts that are constantly in your head, allowing you to find the right words to accurately convey what you’re thinking and feeling.
Besides that, I just finished a very thought provoking book in Dutch: Verslaafd aan Liefde (Addicted to Love) by Jan Geurtz – which strengthened my understanding of the language immensely.
It’s a beautiful book about our attitude towards people and relationships, also available in English.
Bonus tip: Read the books out loud, and try to pronounce as many words as you can correctly.
Literally the first thing Dutch people say when I switch to Dutch from English is:
“Wow, you sound like a real Dutch person! I can’t hear any accent in it!“
Which, as you can imagine, is a wonderful compliment for such a difficult language.
If you practice the correct pronunciation from the very beginning, you’ll have less (or perhaps zero) trouble with making it sound more “original” or “real”.
These are my key take-aways so far after becoming fluent in 3 languages without spending a penny on teachers, masterclasses and all those kind of things.
You can learn a language under such a short amount of time that you wouldn’t even believe – without spending money on material, guidance or tutoring – you just need to find the right approach that fits your needs.
I’m planning to make a Language Learning Guide for free, where I share all my experiences with language learning that I gathered over the years.
But for now, ¡Es hora de aprender Español!
#52 – Become a Chef: Make 1000 dishes – [1000/4]
Another long journey was added to the mix: Cooking 1000 dishes to master my kitchen skills.
Is it gonna take a while? Certainly, and it’s worth it!
After years of craving, I finally made my first apple pie, and it was a tremendous success!
For this one I’m also planning to create a folder where I (eventually) collect all the 1000 recipes & stories to cross it off the list.
The power of effort put into cooking is extremely underestimated on a daily basis.
I became generally more interested in food, this includes being a lot more flexible and creative with the recipes and braver with spicing. The results are mostly astonishing, and due to that, quite short lived 🙂
#61 – Master one of the Martial Arts (Get a Black Belt)
This one is Big.
My roommate introduced me to Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu (BJJ) back in January, where I attended one class which sparked my interest quite quickly.
After moving to Nijmegen in the beginning of May, I immediately joined the club and started training.
Though I’m certainly an ectomorph, which is most likely the worst body type for this kind of Martial Arts, I endlessly enjoy sparring with 90+ kilo gorillas who can tie my spine into a knot.
Due to corona trainings are currently impossible (since it’s full contact) but under the ~3 months I’ve trained there, it was a wonderful time. I had a lot of fun, and I can see myself going down on the Journey of 10+ years to earn that black belt with an ocean’s sweat, and preferably the least amount of blood and tears shed.
According to our Professor/Master, only 3 out of a 1000 person makes it through all the way to black belt.
“A black belt is just a white belt who didn’t quit“
I really like that.
I’m planning to make either a long post where I add all the updates, or make a new folder to keep track of the decade long journey that is still ahead.
For the rest, I’m very proud of how the quality of my writing improved in 2020, the difference is visible, even though I didn’t publish many stories, the ones I did got better and better compared to the early days.
“Yesterday’s me” – the only person on the world with whom we should compete with.
Now it’s time to look at the mind and the body:
Health and Well-being:
Guys, there are so many ways to relieve stress and feel better in your body.
Even a 10-15 minute meditation can turn around your whole day.
(You literally only have to sit and breathe)
Some people enjoy running, others prefer going to the gym, and there are people who love working with their body (Street Workout/Calisthenics, Gymnastics, you name it)
These keep your heart healthy, get you in shape and strengthen your body.
On the other hand, you can also choose something more relaxing:
Breathing techniques, yoga, meditating.
I’ve struggled a lot with yoga – regardless of all the benefits – but I still stretch or massage my body very regularly to keep it flexible and fluid.
Meditating, on the other hand, is a blissful thing. I did a challenge of a 15 minute meditation every day for a month, and the outcome was astonishing. The amount of mental space you get by doing these consistently is simply insane.
Now it doesn’t even cost me any effort to just sit down and meditate, sometimes a whole hour goes by until I finish, and the joy of those moments of mindfulness and peace is simply invaluable in the midst of these crazy days.
If that’s something you have no interest in, you can still check out breathing techniques, for example The Ice Man, Wim Hof’s method.
It’s my ultimate go-to when I’m having a hard time dealing with everything that’s been going, both externally and internally.
[I’d put a link here that explains it, but neither the articles nor the videos are unbiased, so I encourage you to do your own digging]
Next to that: Cold Showers. It’s an unbeatable plan B.
It might be hard to imagine yourself switching from warm water to cold after a long day, but the benefits far outweigh the price you pay for it. Besides, you don’t have to do it all the time, it’s just good to have in your toolkit when you feel stressed or you need a mood-boost throughout the day.
The last thing is the simplest, yet it might require the most discipline:
Good. Quality. Sleep.
Having a stable sleeping rhythm where you give yourself the opportunity to sleep ~8 hours every day, in addition to avoiding food and screens before bedtime is immensely rewarding.
It basically cured and revived me from issues that were haunting me all year. It’s crazy how we sometimes seek a solution in all the possible ways, until it suddenly turns out that the answer was right in front of us since the beginning.
The book Why We Sleep from Matthew Walker explains the importance of sleep in the greatest detail, I certainly recommend skimming through it once – so you know exactly what happens if you do the opposite.
By doing ANY of these consistently, your well-being will significantly increase – and along with that, many others things correlated to it.
With that being said, it is my greatest pleasure to finish off with the last topic of 2020:
Failures & Mistakes:
Nobody is perfect, that’s clear.
However, if you mess the same thing up twice, there is a chance that you didn’t fully examine the issue in detail.
When the same approach doesn’t bring you the desired results or benefits, it is certainly a good idea to look for other angles that might be more effective at getting what you need.
Sticking to the “good old way” of doing something could be safe, but then you’ll never know whether there is a better way of doing it.
Also:
“Doing more of what doesn’t work doesn’t work”
– Nathaniel Branden
1) One Arm Handstand
I’ve been trying to get there since 2015. More than 5 years passed, and I still can’t do it.
Why?
I’m not putting enough effort in.
It would be more than possible for me to learn it, but I’m simply not doing the necessary things to get there.
It’s strange how easy it is to not achieve something that could be done relatively well with some consistency.
Without a plan, training schedule and specific exercises, it’s basically impossible to accurately measure the progress and figure out what are the weak spots to develop the next steps.
Even if I do some research on how to get there, write a workout plan in a word document and start doing it step by step, in 2 weeks I lose interest and never follow up with that plan.
The joy and the excitement is just not there.
Without a strong enough desire, it’s unlike to happen.
Maybe it’s time to look for a training partner?
2) Spanish [/French]
At the beginning of the year, I set the goal to bring my French to a B1 level – starting from scratch.
Since I already learned Dutch under less than a year, I thought it’ll take around the same time with French if I use the same techniques.
It may very well could have been that way, but the same issue arose here:
I’m not putting enough effort in, due to lack of excitement, interest or pleasure in learning.
As I said in the beginning, it’s so good and easy to live here, that I lost a huge portion of my ambition to do these things.
Besides, Dutch was essential when I came. French is by no means “relevant” on a daily basis.
That removes the need and the urgency to learn it.
My attempts at learning it led to insignificant progress due to lack of commitment, but the time kept passing, making the deadline rush towards me like those bullet trains in Japan.
The result is that I didn’t learn any French under the whole year, even though I had nothing but time, due to being free from a full-time job that would use up most of my time and energy.
I had the idea to start with Spanish, since I already have some friends from Latin America and Spain, so it’d be more applicable and relevant, and perhaps even more exciting.
That didn’t work either.
No effort, no interest. 0 progress in picking up a 4th language.
At least my other 3 is quite solid.
In 2021 we’ll add that 4th one to the mix!
3) The Blog & Writing
My goal for this year was to Publish 60 articles and stories – to start giving some support and value, and not just entertaining things.
Well, this is gonna be the 30th; 50% fulfilled.
Now that I’ve discovered that it’s possible to give updates and address things in a tone like this, I’m more comfortable expressing ideas without so many bars to hit, like in the usual storytelling theme.
More flexibility means easier content creating, which will eventually lead to a great load of articles where I’ll address language learning, sports and training, making money, communicating and many other topics that would significantly improve your Life quality, if you used those tips and tricks mentioned in it.
Thank you very much being with me on this long and crazy journey in 2020!
For those of you who made it this far, here is a silly treat:
Day 666 – Sanity is Overrated 
The Longer you look at it, the weirder it gets
Have a wonderful New Year!
Take care,
Erik
Have you ever asked yourself what makes the most charming person in the room so charismatic to everybody?
It’s certainly not their style, profession or sense of humor. You don’t have to wear a $1000 suit, work for a law firm in New York or perform as a comedian.
There is something else to their character that makes them a magnet of attention and interest.
If we look at the way they talk, move or express themselves – those subtle layers in their persona – we begin to understand what makes them bewitch every single person in their aura.
What is that one quality that makes them so special?
It’s clearly not their height, tone of voice or skin color. This unique attribute is beyond genetical. After all, they’re humans just like us. That means this feature is available for all of us.
A diamond that was buried in us all along:
The beauty of being Original.
“If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how amazing you can be.”
— Maya Angelou
No quality is as powerful in human beings as their unique ability to be an individual.
When they own each and every one of their actions, thoughts and feelings, when they talk with passion, laugh with joy and move as if the whole world was a canvas waiting to be painted with their personality.
That makes everyone in the room gravitate towards their energy, warmth and appeal.
And all this vivid affection is available for you too, if you’re willing to do one simple thing.
It’s easy to fool ourselves into thinking that the only way to become popular is through fancy clothes, big wallets or good looks.
Now, even if you dressed out of a millionaire’s wardrobe and you had the body of a Greek God, you would quickly realize that your light is still as dim as a flashlight against the sun.
The people who dare to own everything they do – no matter how much they earn, what they work or how they look – will always have the spotlight of the room.
The solution to get there lies in a simple exercise that anybody can do – yet only a handful of people has ever done.
These people asked themselves one question before hitting the road:
What is the difference between an average and an extraordinary person?
The answer is: Their actions.
The average person will have average conversations with average words, hang out with similar people who share similar stories with each other. They will cook conventional foods, drive mainstream cars and dress in common clothes.
Average decisions lead to average results.
Nothing will particularly stand out or become special.
The unique individual, on the other hand, will have sparkling conversations with fancy words, spend time with the most diverse and colorful people, who share remarkable ideas and tell extraordinary tales to each other. They eat strange foods, drive odd cars and wear silly clothes.
There is a single key trait they developed that allows them to be original – and you’re only one decision away to become like that too.
And no, it won’t cost you your entire life savings or reputation.
In fact it’s free, yet the experience is invaluable. It all starts with one story you can always tell on a wedding party, date or at the campfire with all the eyes and ears fixed on you:
How you once took a banana for a City tour.
All it takes is a sturdy fruit, a rope and a marker – and your Life is guaranteed to transform.
Now you might be wondering: How can such a silly thing have such a large impact on you?
There are 3 undeniable benefits of this Life-changing walk that’ll turn you into the definition of charisma:
1) An Unshakable Sense of Freedom and Confidence
You’ve already heard it a 1000 times. “You have to be confident!” or “Just be yourself,” and you probably have to throw up every time you see a quote about it on Instagram.
Everybody tells you to do it, but nobody tells you how or why it’s one of the most fundamental parts of turning into the most lively version of yourself.
After all, we all have a certain degree of confidence – and we’re fine, we can manage.
But instead of fine, wouldn’t you want to feel excellent?
The goal is to vividly express yourself without feeling restricted, and that is where we usually hit the first wall of inner resistance: “But what will other people think if I do that?”
Even with the most mind-blowing idea, you might still stand idle and do nothing, because of the possibility of looking like a fool, being judged, or perhaps even ridiculed by the community.
That, my friend, is completely irrelevant – and you know it.
But knowing that doesn’t get you out of the cage and allow you to do what you always wanted, does it?
If you want to live a Life where other people’s thoughts don’t dictate your actions, where you can move, talk and dress the way you always wanted – all this without feeling the slightest degree of embarrassment – then taking a banana for a walk is exactly what would get you there.
You’ll be immune to the limiting factors of social pressure and influence
No more “What will other people think of me?”
2) The Ultimate Conversation Starter
If I had a dollar for every time someone came up to me with a funny comment while I was doing it, I’d be able to stop world hunger.
Not just that, some of those conversations led to lasting friendships with incredible people.
The kind of people you always wanted to associate and surround yourself with – adventurous, smart and friendly.
On some not-so-rare occasions, a few people was so amazed and puzzled that they literally asked for permission to pet my banana, and blew up in laughter after they did.
It works especially well if you give a name to it – I always write “Bobo” on mine, and make sure to drag it in a way that keeps the named side upwards
It’s like having a button that suddenly turns you into a famous person – a popular athlete, actor or singer. Everyone wants to take pictures, get to know you and express their admiration for what you do.
3) An Immense Feeling of Pride and Accomplishment
If we’re honest, how many people do you know who would dare to do this?
Not many, we can agree on that – but “would do” and “did” are two entirely different things.
In fact, you might be the very first person to do this in your City. Perhaps in your region or even in the whole Country. Isn’t that amazing?
You’ll be the member of one of the most exclusive clubs on Earth, where throughout the whole history of human beings, only a few hundred people were admitted in.
This number will grow quickly over the years, but you can be a part of the very few people who started it.
The ones who did it before it became a thing.
Are you ready to step out of the shadows and finally become the main character of your own Story?
Grab a pen or open your calendar and write up a reminder:
“Take a walk with a banana”
By doing so, you push the first domino that starts the life-changing transformation you were always looking for.
Or, you can choose not to.
Yet if you honestly answer the following question:
Are you satisfied with how much you’re living up to your absolute full potential?
Your inner voice will reply without hesitation.
You can just go on with your Life, forget that you’ve ever read this post and get lost in the Sea of mediocre decisions, losing a chance to turn into something remarkable –
Or commit to make a Life changing decision, so one day in the far future you’ll be able to look back on this moment and say with a proud, relieved tone:
“Thank god I made the right choice!”
Now you have the key you’ve always been looking for, and it’s up to you to open the door.
The question is:
Will you?
PS: If you think it’s a joke, here is how Taking a Banana for a Walk Looks Like in Action.
Huge thanks for the Illustration to pch.vector!
- The Ingredients:
Dough: - Apple Pie Mix [Albert Heijn]
- Egg (1)
- 160g Butter
- Lemon (Grated peel)
Filling: - 6 Apples (Crisp-sour type)
- Nuts (Walnuts or Almonds)
- Lemon (Juice)
- Cinnamon
Kitchen Appliances: - Oven
- Ø24cm square baking form
I was ready to turn my Life upside down and conquer the World of Pies.
The day before, I was on my way to the neighbor city for a training session, with a distance of 20km to cover. Cycling on the road, about halfway, I stumbled upon a street stand filled with walnuts and a cardboard sign saying: “€2 – 0,5kg”
They were already measured and packed in, next to a tiny steel box where the coins should be placed.
“Geweldig!1“
Such a coincidence couldn’t be more reassuring.
I promptly fished out my wallet and paid for the delicious babies.
A minute later as I turned left on that exact street, I saw a chicken the size of a squirrel chase a 2 year old child on a fiets2!
It got loose from a farmer’s garden, and began to run after little kids.
The mom was trying to gently push the beast away, but he was relentless, obsessed with his mission to assert dominance on a small human being.
I wish I had recorded it, everyone was laughing on the street, you don’t see such a hilarious spectacle on a daily.
After a decent calisthenics session with my buddy, another 1 hour cycling followed back to my place.
Filled with confidence and energy, I began setting the walnuts free.
Man, was it ridiculously easy!
I remember being 9 or 8, smashing walnuts with a hammer on our concrete driveway, trying to extract the fruit of our nut-tree, with barely any crumbles coming out of the hard shell, while my fingers were bleeding under my nails from all the pointless scratch attempts.
But these were fucking effortless, as if the protective layer was made out of paper.
One hit with the hammer, split them, and they all fell out basically intact.
It took me ~25 minutes to do the whole bag. The last piece came out in full, not a single molecule was broken.
Then came the dough test; the scariest part – since I’ve never done anything like that.
– Grab a bowl and pour the mix in it.
– Scramble/Beat an egg and use 2/3 of the liquid
– Add (vegan) butter, measured out on the scale down to the last gram: 160g
– Sprinkle the grated lemon peel for a little extra fanciness.
Then, the Play-Doh time began.
It was like being a 4 year old again, but this time I wasn’t (yet) going to eat the wet sand.
There were no thoughts of fear, stress or struggle, just me and the dough.
After fully kneading it into a yellow bun, the job was almost done.
I buttered the bottom of the springform pan, using my fingers like a kid – due to the lack of a cooking brush in our inventory – and tried to evenly spread 2/3 of the dough there.
At first, I had a wonderful idea of flattening it out on a freshly washed wooden board, and using the shape of the spring form to make the size flawlessly adjustable. What I forgot, is that dough and wet wood don’t do well – especially without flour – so it properly got glued down on the board. I had to scratch it off with a spatula and start anew.
Round 2: Successfully managed to not mess it up by hand and evenly spread the dough on the bottom of the pan. Another quick smearing on the sides with more butter, and I could carefully build the walls of my square pite3
The result looked like this:
Step 1: Check.
Step 2: Cut the apples in fairly even pieces.
The trick was the following: Cut it in half, then those two halves in half, and halve those halves into halves.
Simple as fuck. From then on, it’s just 4 more cuts into cubes, and you’re done.
Exactly 32 slices/apple.
Add a touch of cinnamon and a (whole) lemon’s juice to keep it from oxidation, then break the delicious walnuts in it for extra satisfaction.
Jackpot, isn’t it?
Lastly, struggle to flatten out the remaining 1/3 of the dough in stripes, place them on top of the cake and gently cover them with the rest of the beaten up egg – by putting your fingertip in the bowl and smear it everywhere on top of it; again, no brush in the kitchen.
Pre-heat the oven to 180° Celsius (356° Fahrenheit), put it in and wait 45 minutes.
I could not believe how easy it was, or at least how the thought of failure didn’t even occur once.
My level of confidence in cooking raised significantly, especially after challenging myself to do more of these lately.
I’m only 996 different recipes away from becoming a Chef.
With such speed, it’ll only take 30 years to accomplish!
The writing part is more difficult than the cooking; I definitely didn’t see that coming!
In the future, I’ll try focus on the essential steps of the cooking, rather than writing a whole story.
That should help a bit.
The result, by the way, looked like this:
Gorgeous, isn’t she?
It tastes even better than how it looks, trust me.
The very first bite made me fall in love with it; the juicy pieces mixed with the crunchy parts, all this to the scent of cinnamon…The definition of tastegasm.
– [Holy shit] How could I not do this all along?
When I devoured one quarter, a thought kicked me in the butt:
“Whohoho, the neighbors! They’ll be charmed!“
I immediately jumped in a shirt and knocked on their door.
No answer, let’s knock once more.
Their daughter opens the door, and we have a cute little chat about how it’s not the right time at all. Her parents were taking a nap.
– Do you have a plate?
She goes to the kitchen to bring it, only to realize that it’s too high up, and she can’t reach it.
I went in the house to fix it, when his father suddenly appeared behind me:
“Hééé, do you want some apple pie?”
I guess he didn’t mind waking up to a freshly baked cake, he just smiled, thanked me and took the plate.
Left side: Done
I sent a text to my neighbor on the right, we met on the balcony in a blink of an eye.
He put it to the test, and even though it my was first time ever, he said it’s certainly a success.
Now the question is: What’s next?
Take care and bake well,
Erik
2020.11.15. – Day 664
Bucket List Progress:
– Become a Chef: Make 1000 dishes (#52) – [1000/4]
Writer’s Notes:
[NL] Geweldig!1 – [ENG] Awesome! – [HU] Fantasztikus!
[NL] Fiets2 – [ENG] Bicycle – [HU] Kerékpár
[HU] Pite3 – [ENG] Pie – [NL] Taart
The current population of the Netherlands is around 17.4 million people, but the amount of bikes in the country exceed 22.5 million – that is, 1.3 bicycle / person.
And today, I finally got my first!
If you manage to survive 1,5 years without the most important possession in this place, you’re officially Bear Grylls.
How did I do it?
I simply borrowed it in times of need. In fact, one time I even cycled over a 100km under a day with a bicycle that is only suitable for grocery shopping – barely capable of covering that 800 meters between the house and the store down the street.
To be honest, it seemed foolish to buy something that I don’t “immediately” need; and since I was spoiled with good people around me who always gave their bike when I needed it, the idea of getting one just never occurred to me – until today.
You see, sometimes you just wake up on a regular weekday, and absolutely everything goes your way. There is no traffic in the morning, your colleagues bring you coffee, a stranger’s dog brightens up your day, or you find a 20€/$ bill on the street. Everything is pleasant and easy, and you didn’t even have to fight for it like every other day.
I’m not saying they’re common, but you know they exist.
The proof of that culminated this evening, when I went up on Marktplaats – basically the Dutch craigslist – and came across a seemingly flawless bike that was very, very cheap. Under cheap, I mean 2 or 3 times cheaper than what it would cost in a dealership. The seller had good reviews, most of those came from satisfied customers who bought refurbished bikes from him.
“HolyShitThisIsMyChanceIGottaBeQuick”
Since such opportunities are as rare as a flying pig, I immediately sent him a message about being interested in buying it.
An hour later he replied – I could check it out right away.
The first set of “This is too good to be true” thoughts started to appear, but I drowned them with excitement and belief. It seemed fair to have a little faith in the seller’s benevolence and decency.
You know, the bike business here can be very shady. Since it’s one of the most popular commodities in the country, there is even an urban myth that spreads between close friends in dark alleys; a secret whispered cautiously, to give you a last resort solution after a night of excessive drinking: If you walk up to a guy in a hoodie at any Central Station between midnight and 3 am in the morning, you can score a bike for €10 in 2 minutes.
If you’re wasted, tired and pissed – unable to find your own two wheelie – this saves your soul at the cost of damning another. Choose wisely.
When we began discussing the details, I noticed that I did the most cruel thing a Dutch person can do to someone who is practicing their language: I switched to English. He messed up the word order so sadly, that I unconsciously turned off my Dutch and continued in English.
Oh, how proud I was to “make a Dutch deal”, only to see my pride turn to dust as I realize that he is also an expat struggling to grasp the complexity of the language.
We agreed to meet at 6 in the evening, so I dressed up in a blink and jumped on the first bus towards his place. The destination was Beuningen, a seemingly rich neighborhood I’ve never been in.
The colors of the fall made it look like I’m in a park, rather than a city – the houses were so well built, it felt like they’re the part of nature’s abundant diversity:
As I walked up to the door at the address he gave me, a kind man came out of his workshop, unlocked the bike and told me to go for a round to see if it fits. I couldn’t imagine this happening in Hungary – You could just cycle away, and never come back to pay. But here, they trust you with blind faith. Even expats do, which makes you think how great the community is.
To my surprise, the condition of the bike was indeed almost mint. The gears, the breaks, the steering. There was a lamp both on the back and on the front, hell, even the chain and the cogs were freshly oiled.
All this for 69 euros.
Even 200 wouldn’t have been too much though.
I handed him the money with a warm thank you, and began my 30 minute journey home.
That’s when I saw the most beautiful sunset in the middle of a golden road:
Fall, you’re gorgeous.
My day of anti-Murphy’s law was full of peace and joy. I really couldn’t have asked for more.
To say goodbye, here is the river with a marvelous view:
Remember: The lucky days will come to you too, just don’t forget to look while they do.
Take care,
Erik
2020.10.22 – Day 640
Another day, another dollar.
As the world is being taken over by corona, not many of us can afford to pass up opportunities to get some extra income. Even if it’s not within our expertise and we don’t make a bank, having a few extra bucks never harmed a wallet.
Today I agreed to do some gardening for one of the most successful [self-made] businessmen of the Netherlands. I get paid to help, but I would’ve done it anyway even if I didn’t get a cent.
Why?
Because the real value is in learning from people who already made it.
If you think about it, how often can you spend some time with an actual millionaire?
Possibly not quite often; but I’m sure most of us would do so if we had the chance.
Previously I already mentioned a few lessons I’ve learned from him, but each time there is something new that broadens my perspective – and not only financially. Our mindset is equally important when it comes to building wealth, and to develop the right one we need examples and mentoring.
The best way for that is to hang out with successful Gents and Ladies.
That’s why: Always take the opportunity when you have it.
“If someone offers you an amazing opportunity and you’re not sure you can do it, say yes – then learn how to do it later.”
Richard Branson
The task for today was to prepare his garden – the winter is coming – by cutting off a couple of fresh branches and putting them on the top of his fence, so his nosy neighbor couldn’t spy on him.
He gave me a spear-saw, garden shears and a ladder.
“Put the ladder in an angle, hug the trees and don’t lean backwards – then you won’t fall.”
After internalizing the instructions, I began chopping off hundreds of twigs from the bottom to the top, around 7 or 8 meters high.
I don’t have acrophobia, but this puts you in a dilemma:
– If you look down, you can’t really see what’s going on with the saw, and distance from the ground makes you cling to the tree harder than usual.
– If you look up, however, you strain your neck and all the sawdust will land in your eyeballs.
None of these are ideal, but the work has to be done.
To my surprise, his dog (Jane) was running all around us, risking an accident by being hit with all the falling stuff. If only we could learn how to be that free and nonchalant.
2 hours into the job we had a sandwich break, and a chat with a friend of his who was older than 85 years.
I didn’t understand a single word he was saying. After living here for 642 days, my Dutch is pretty impressive, but there was no way I could decipher the century old accent of his.
[Apparently neither do they, but they only told me after he went away – “Just smile and wave boys, smile and wave“]
We continued to clean up the mess that was growing there in the abundant Dutch rain/forest, when his Lady arrived to make a delicious lunch for the men “working on the field”
I remember standing on the top of the ladder in the far end of the property, when the smells sneaked up in my nostrils and turned my mouth into a saliva-tsunami.
They waved me in and served the ultimate English-breakfast I haven’t (ever) yet eaten.
If you’re an Englishman, you know the drill – bacon, fried eggs, toasts, roasted tomato and sausages. Sometimes even beans. How can you say no to such a thing?
Now, with our bodies fueled & our energy filled, we tackled the most difficult item on the list:
Cutting down a sick tree.
Last occasion we almost got killed, but Lady Fortune spared us for another day.
He tied up a rope as high as he could possibly place it, attached it to the tractor and slowly rolled backwards until it was tight enough to pull the tree.
The chainsaw began to buzz after an almighty jerk on the cord, as it slowly cut through all the way until the middle.
“When I raise my hand, go backwards with the tractor and gently bend the tree in the right direction.”
Easy and simple, all I have to do is touch the gas pedal when I’m signaled.
Before he could raise his hand, the tree broke under the pressure and twisted on the fence, swinging the trunk right next to my Boss’ chest. 3 or 4 seconds passed in dead silence. It could’ve cut his guts open.
He was just standing there, completely unshaken, scratching his head.
The tree fell on the road, and the chainsaw was stuck in the cut-crack.
No matter how hard we tried to pull, it wouldn’t come out of there. The pressure from both sides was hugging the blade, like a mother whose son came back from war without missing a limb.
We tried lifting the trunk with poles, supported by logs and wooden planks, but it didn’t even bend.
That’s when he brought his wooden Mjölnir to smash an axe-head in the crack, to widen the gap.
The next thing I saw, I wouldn’t believe if I hadn’t been there myself:
He spits in his hand, lifts the hammer and swings at the steel with Thor’s strength.
It visibly pushed deeper, so he smacked it 2, 3 and 4 more times until the axe sank into the crack.
The chainsaw wouldn’t budge, nonetheless.
What I noticed, on the other hand, is that the crack next to it was almost open. If we could cut that, the trunk would fall on the ground and take the pressure off of our electrical axe.
I brought a hand saw and began playing the ‘Fastest Hand on the West’.
There was only a 2 cm thick quarter of the tree trunk left, when it finally gave in with a loud crack and freed our Chainsawlibur from nature’s hands.
He gave me the famous Dutch Wink and began chopping up the rest.
It was around 17:20 at this point, and we started at 8:15. Almost 10 hours of endless branch cutting led to the final boss of the day: Cleaning up the tree that blocks the path to the stable and a field full of sheep.
These moments always make me realize one extremely relevant thing:
Bit by bit, piece by piece, you DO progress – even if it doesn’t seem like it.
Consistency and perseverance are the ultimate tricks.
By the time it was 18:30, we cleaned up every single branch and twig. The Garden was clean and neat
“I wish we made a before pic” – I looked at him almost sadly, acknowledging that I won’t see the significance of the change we accomplished today.
Right as we placed the tools back to the shed, a heavenly smell started to seduce our noses.
“I’m going to stand here and wait” – He stopped in front of the house, waiting for the good news:
“Dinner is ready!”
With the enthusiasm of a kid at Christmas eve, I went inside to see what it is.
– Aardappel1 gratin, steamed broccoli, salad and meat.
Or, if I may say, a dinner that beats most of the restaurant food I ever ate.
I had to eat with my eyes closed, the flavors in my mouth were playing a movie directed by Michael Bay – my tongue exploded with the sensory of tastes.
Every spoonful carried the love of the Woman who cooked it gladly.
“We’re going to drink a glass of wine, Erik”
He popped out the cork and smelled it for no longer than a blink. If someone knows what good wine is, it’s him.
“Ah yes, it tastes great!”
He poured both of us a glass next to the divine meal. It was an extraordinary French beauty.
As we filled our bellies with delicious wine and aardappel gratin, they told me about their greatest struggle at chilling:
“We don’t often watch the telly [Remarkable English], but we’ve just discovered Netflix, and we didn’t know where to start, there are so many things!”
You should’ve seen my smile, this was the cutest comment I’ve heard this year.
The wonders of the modern world never cease to amaze the people living in it.
Before we licked our plates clean, we switched from leisure to address business, discussing how Corona affects our economy.
Since I’m a Medical Masseur – or a professional massage therapist – it’s quite challenging.
I told them that my reputation in the neighborhood must be great, because all they hear is people screaming and crying after they come to me.
They probably think that I’m gay, but that’s okay. My clients are forever grateful for every painful minute, since the second they stand up, their bodies are fixed.
They burst into laughter, with a warm emphasis made by the wrinkles caused by age.
I felt welcome, at home, as if I was a member of the Family – not an outsider who moved here from Hungary.
At one point they even brought up my hobby of Banana walking, which is my strategy to reset the “What other people think of me” issue in my brain.
When I showed them a video of me doing it, another round of loud laughter came out in disbelief.
I really enjoy doing things like this.
As we finished dining, he reached for his wallet and turned to me
“Erik, I’ve got something for you, because I know you wanted it”
He pulls out a 200€ bill and hands it over to pay for the hours I’ve worked for him.
Last year he showed me a 500€ bill [the biggest there is], and there aren’t many of them – most of those are owned by the rich. Ever since I wanted to get one from him, so I could have it framed in my room/future office.
That day is getting closer, but today I got this:
Though the day ended with only 10 hours of work on a Saturday, he was satisfied with what we achieved.
Since he works 12 hour days, 6 days a week – no wonder he got where he is – this was one of those chill days, but by no means lazy or unproductive.
“In the end you’ll always feel satisfied with the progress you made. Just keep working for it” – he told me in the car on our way to my place.
His Life is a solid example that proves it.
Let’s give that a shot and see where it leads.
Take care and chase dreams,
Erik
2020.10.24 – Day 642
Writer’s Notes:
[NL] Aardappel1 – [ENG] Potato – [HU] Burgonya / Krumpli
What’s the most charming word in your first language?
Tough question, I admit it. If somebody asked me today, I wouldn’t know how to answer it, mainly because I don’t speak it anymore on a daily basis.
It’s quite a paradox, if you think about it.
When you consistently use a language for years, you get better at shaping, sculpting and refining everything you say down to the smallest detail. The way you express yourself is colorful, precise and clear, but the words feel dull and mundane. Your capacity to see your art has gone extinct.
However, when you switch to another one, say for a couple of years – the first one starts to decay. Not to the point where you can’t speak it correctly, but your degree of finesse weakens by the day; your ability to creatively articulate slowly degrades – and that’s when you notice it.
The magic. The beauty. The wonders of your own language you’ve been blind to for all those years.
Suddenly you find yourself appreciating the little quirks, the hidden meanings and the witty twists used by those who’ve mastered it over the decades.
It’s funny how unaware we can be to the marvels that surround us every day.
Until Life reminds us in a playful way.
Today – over a 1000km away from my homeland and birthplace – I heard the sweetest “Helló!” of the Hungarian language.
I didn’t know what to expect from today’s date. The texts seemed rather dry than enthusiastic, and the topics were superficial, just so we could keep the juice for the real thing.
She gracefully rolled in with her bike, hopped off and greeted me.
Her hazel brown hair wiggled on her shoulders as we began to walk on the concrete. She was so swift, I could barely keep up with her speed. I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen someone move with such a passion and energy.
The conversation was fluent from the very first minute. Not just the themes, but the language itself, which was supposed to be rusty. Of course, there were moments of struggle when we couldn’t recall the simplest words that are used on a daily basis, but we substituted them with the ones we knew in English.
What are the chances, really?
Hungarian is spoken by 13 million people, and more than 10 million of them live in Hungary.
Though she was born & raised in Germany, her way of talking was vivid and expressive – much more than the people I used to live with.
That was one of the things that pushed me in the direction of moving away.
The desire for color and variety; the chance to become fluent in more than just one language. It’s like being a Chef of linguistics – your thoughts have a different taste in each tongue you speak, and you gain the ability to mix those flavors into something unique. You can spice your days up in any way you wish.
If that’s not a reason to learn another language, I don’t know what is.
In my school years, I had a bad habit of speaking [Hungarian] so fast that not even my mother could decipher what I was saying. It happened all the time, the teachers constantly had to remind me to slow down, because they couldn’t comprehend anything, no matter how hard they sharpened their native ears.
Though I thought it disappeared, with her it came back in 5 minutes.
I was so excited and happy for the great company, that my tongue began to roll with such a pace that would make even a Spanish person ashamed.
Yet, she was listening intently throughout the whole date, making sure she doesn’t miss a thing.
Every word, every sentence we exchanged has found a way to fascinate our brains, keeping us from spacing out or visiting the land of daydreams. In a World of distractions, that’s quite a feat.
How often do you have the privilege of conversing in such a deep and engaging way, that it doesn’t allow you to drift away?
Just think about it for a minute, I’ll wait.
At one point she switched to German and asked me:
“Do you speak German / understand it?”
– Nein nein nein nein nein! – I said, Imitating that guy with the mustache.
That’s all I could say after 8 years of studying it.
The melody of her laughter immediately turned the environment warmer and more vivid, despite that the Sun was already on its way to rise in another country, leaving us with fading colors and growing shades.
Our fast paced wandering has come to an end at my place, culminating in the kitchen where we began making the dish I polished for the past 1.5 years, which I know would make our tastebuds dance like Michael J.
She heroically offered to cut the onions for me.
As the first layers of tears began to appear, she switched to a comical tone to illustrate what she’s going to say about today:
“He made me cry on the first date!”
Humor, charm and kitchen skills. All in one kit.
By the time we finished eating, a quick glimpse at the clock revealed that it wasn’t even past 8.
“If I smoke a joint, is that chill?”
– Hohoho, natuurlijk1!
The amount of surprises she could fit in her sleeve was endearing.
The occasion demanded the right setting: Candle lights, smooth songs and a warm cup of tea.
You really couldn’t ask for more after a day like this.
We dove into the topics of culture; touching films, music, traditions and language.
Though we grew up in an entirely different place with a distinction in all these, we could effortlessly bridge that gap in each theme, even if some concepts were missing/hard to translate.
The greatest struggle was caused by the word “patriarchy”. There was no equivalent to it in Hungarian, but both of us were sure that there must be.
After all the mental effort we put in to communicate, the first signs of sleepiness began to appear.
We cured it by tasting the evergreen German and Hungarian hits:
The Hungarians would be these: [I couldn’t recall the German ones, even if I wanted it]
– A 67-es út (Republic)
– Jég dupla whiskyvel (Charlie)
– Gyöngyhajú lány (Omega)
She lit up like a Christmas tree, shining brighter than the candles on the windowsill.
Her face was like canvas, waiting to be revealed. She could paint the liveliest emotions in a blink – with Picasso’s talent and passion to express it.
Thanks to this energy, an enthusiastic story followed about the dark side of Germany’s most popular volksfeest2.
Octoberfest, you guessed it.
This is the side that we don’t seem, or don’t care to notice.
The puddles of vomit scattered across entire cities, the amount of braincells killed/minute, and a couple of tragic deaths that occur during those weeks.
We are unaware of the aftermath that the celebration leaves in its wake – all we see are happy drunkards snorting cocaine, while beings served with 20 glasses of beer, which is gracefully carried by one very skilled German Lady.
The storytime was interrupted by a neighbor of mine, who began to fanatically wave at my window with his dog standing next to him. It was half past 10 in the evening, though his warm smile didn’t break our moment of intimacy.
What a wonderful neighborhood to live in.
At last, we stumbled upon the greatest common ground between the people who speak our language:
“Oh, you are from Hungary! Are you hungry?” *laughs hysterically*
Every single Dad thinks he is the first person on Earth to come up with this.
Then there is “Puszi Puszi”, which sounds exactly like the genital of a Lady. Thought it means “XOXO”, and we too, use it at parting, unfortunately that doesn’t save us from the weird looks we get every time we say it.
When the time to say farewell came, I gave her a copy of my favorite book: The Alchemist.
Taking my chance to exercise some courtesy, I put the coat on her the old-school way, like the Gents do in the movies.
She passed me an elbow bump – respecting the rules of the country – and softly rolled away on the moonlit street.
And that’s what I call a Happy Ending.
Stay healthy and stay safe,
Erik
Writer’s notes:
[NL] Natuurlijk!1 – [ENG] Of course! / Sure! – [HU] Persze! / Naná!
[NL] Volksfeest2 – [ENG] Folk festival / National feast – [HU] Nemzeti ünnep / Népünnep
Movie suggestions – True Hungarian Classics:
– A Pál Utcai Fiúk (The Boys of Paul Street)
– Indul a bakterház (The Stationmaster Meets His Match)
And the famous “Üvegtigris” trilogy (Glass Tiger)
Credits:
– Country Flag Icons
– Spices wallpaper
Can you make a dish without paying for anything?
And I don’t mean starting a fire by rubbing sticks together to cook your dinner – though it sounds like a fun experiment – but rather to get the ingredients from Mother Nature.
Sneaking onto a farmland to steal apples and pears is cheating, but going to the forest and plucking certain shrooms, leaves, nuts or even berries to fill your belly without paying a penny is simply fascinating.
Enter: The challenge of today.
I remember asking my roommate whether we could roast the chestnuts I’ve found on the ground when we were walking in the city.
“Those are not the ones, they’re not edible if they come in a shell like this”
Honestly, I had no clue what the difference is, but my enthusiasm died instantly – until I stumbled upon them again, but this time in the woods during my Tarzan hike where I intended to climb trees.
This time I googled it.
The edible ones have a spiky shell – they’re thin, sharp and there is a lot of them.
The non-edible version is just a soft green ball, bulky but undefended. Just like Shrek.
“BINGO!” I said, and I curiously started gathering them in my hands.
When the number of holes on my fingertips started to go over a 100, I changed strategy and began using a stick to open up the shells – without having to hurt myself – which allowed me to pick the ones that are freshly fallen and have not yet cracked. Each shell had exactly 3 nuts in it. No more, no less. Their size, on the other hand, was completely different. Most of the time there was only 1 that was thick, shiny-brown and unharmed by insects. The rest were either flat, deformed or already half-eaten.
It took about an hour to fill up my bag; the feeling of increasing weight on my shoulders made me very excited.
“This is going to be such a good story” I said to myself, as I stuffed it with as many nuts as I can.
The people who hiked past stopped and asked multiple times:
“What are you doing/What’s that?”
It’s kastanje.
I’ve learned the word in Dutch, which is very close to the Hungarian word “Gesztenye”, yet none of them even resembles “chestnut” in English.
When I finished, my bag was bulging with nuts like a pouch full of gold in the Medieval ages.
To relax and celebrate the first success (collecting enough ingredients), I went full Tarzan and climbed up everywhere.
After my Inner Monkey has had its fill of happiness, I went home and googled how to prepare these nutritious snacks.
I thought it’s easy to do them. Just a little peeling here, a touch of roasting there, and boom – ready to serve.
Nut even close. There is a ~4-hour long process until you finish them, though most of the steps are passive, so you don’t have to stand there.
The rules are simple:
– Their shell has to be cut open (in half, or in the shape of an X), so they can expand without exploding and ruining your oven.
– Then, you must soak them in water for several hours, so they become softer and easier to consume when they’re finished [+ the worms, if there are any, float to the surface]
– Last but not least you put them in the oven with a touch of water under them, so when it evaporates, it creates enough humidity for the nuts to roast evenly without drying out/burning too quickly.
Now that we’ve had all the theory, let’s begin:
Step 1) Quality control
Checking each one from the bottom to the top, looking for (worm)holes, and squeezing the sides to see if there are any soft spots. There were only a few bad ones; still around 0,5kg left for the good part, which will end up as ~0,25kg after the peeling is done.
Step 1.1) Organize them into groups
Small, medium and big chestnuts, so I wouldn’t have to waste time on the small ones when I can just start with the big ones and go downwards.
Step 2) Open up the shell
This one is perhaps the hardest step. If you cut too deep and split the meat open, the peeling will be a hell of a disaster – the nut will come out in pieces, and you don’t want that.
Or, cut too shallow and you won’t have enough space to extract them.
It’s a very delicate process, which meant I had to try my best to do it well.
The result looked like this:
Step 3) Soaking
2 hours, at least.
*Bluggy bluggy bluggy bluggy bluggy*
I pushed them all in a bowl of water and watched them sink.
No worms came out floating, the quality control was executed flawlessly.
Step 3.1) Pat them dry with a towel or dish cloth
Drain the water and rub the rest of it off.
Step 4) Roasting
Put them on a baking sheet with the cuts facing the ceiling [mind the space] and place them in a pre-heated oven for 30-45 minutes [depending on size & quality] on 210°C / 410°F.
Tip: Put another baking sheet under the nuts with some water in it, that’ll take care of the extra humidity they need while they’re baking
Around halfway, I remember watching the slices of the shells curl up and break around the X with a broad smile on my face.
“It’s working, it’s working!” I said on a high-pitch, as the smoking oven filled the kitchen with wet mist. The trick to give them a little more steam worked wonderfully, they remained tender and neat. Not a single one ended up dry or burned, though that’s when the most important question came to annoy me:
How do I know if it’s done if I’ve never eaten it?
What is the sign of them being roasted properly?
Both the taste and the texture were unfamiliar to me, so I couldn’t rely on my memory.
In this case, I always go for the golden mean in the recipe.
Roast for 30 to 45 minutes? 37.5 is the number I’m going with.
After I took out the golden brown beauties, a quick cool-down session followed for 15 minutes.
There was only one step separating me from enjoying the fruit of my labor today:
Step 5) Peeling
If I was managing a section in Hell, I’d make the damned souls peel chestnuts for all eternity – I’m pretty sure I’d get a promotion in a week.
After 30 minutes of cutting the skin under my nails, hamstering out the stuck pieces with my front teeth, and proudly filling a bowl with more and more nutmeat, the results were astonishing:
It was warm, tender and sweet. All this for free, 100% nature made.
Satisfaction: 10/10.
If you’re planning to try it, I’d suggest you do it quickly, because the season is over when November creeps in.
If not, you can try again next year. Trust me, it’s worth it. Every minute from start to finish.
Take care and bake well,
Erik
2020.10.18. – Day 636
Bucket List Progress:
– Become a Chef: Make 1000 dishes (#52) – [1000/3]
“You can do contests with this material…and win.”
That’s what the senior Toastmaster/Public Speaker told me after I finished my speech.
I don’t remember the last time I was this hyped for a project I needed to finish.
For this performance, I decided to apply the feedback from the previous one, so instead of memorizing, I was going to improvise it.
There were bullet points of course, but the weight of the endless chain of words didn’t anchor me down anymore; it was just a creative expression in the heat of the moment, doing my best with what I have and what happens while I’m standing there.
This came with a little extra anxiousness. After practicing the speech multiple times (each time with different sentences, since it wasn’t written), I realized that it won’t fit into my limit of 7 minutes. It was continuously hitting 9, even if I sped things up a bit.
That’s when I started to cut out the bullshit. The parts that were the least effective. Everything that didn’t truly represent my message – until I polished it down to a solid 7 and a half minutes.
Close, but still doesn’t cut it. It needs to be less, so there is a margin of error in case I freeze.
At this point I asked myself whether I could say things slightly faster, or arrange my equipment in a way to fit the stages of the speech – so it saves me time when I get to the point of using it. This time I made it under ~5 minutes. The bare minimum for a speech – too fast! I need to slow down a bit.
But now I knew it was possible to make it.
Practice after practice, I kept narrowing it down to the sweetspot of somewhere between 6 and 6,5 minutes. I was more and more comfortable in my body, some of the good lines I came up with along the way earned a permanent spot in the speech, and the performance went fluently. Except the finale.
It was a high risk, high reward finishing touch to the speech – with a 35% success rate. Since my speech was due this evening, I couldn’t practice enough to rack those number up to 70 or 80; but I chose to keep that part in, and see how it goes under all that pressure and heat. Even if I mess it up, at least I’ve tried it. In that room, the word “failure” doesn’t exist; we use the words “learning” and “practice”. That makes it a perfectly safe environment for experimenting with ideas that are crazy like this.
After performing it for the last time in our cozy living room without anyone watching me, I was confident that each element now has its proper place, there were plenty of witty remarks in my memory and even more tricks in my sleeve, so the whole show would be fluent and astonishing.
But I was still stressed out, completely.
I was anxious about forgetting the order, or messing up a trick. I checked at least 8 times whether I surely have everything packed in, just so I wouldn’t miss an item that is crucial to perform the speech.
I was worried about not getting there in time, because Murphy’s law was all in on me.
Just to represent how unwilling Life can be at times, here is a brief summary of the amount of obstacles that arose this evening:
Almost all the time, I go together with a friend of mine who has a car. This time he was on vacation, so I asked someone else for a ride. He said: “Sure, alright!” Until 6 hours before the meeting, he tells me that he can’t attend due to some coughing, which means he might have corona, but he doesn’t want to risk it. Understandable, this means option number 3: Cycling.
Uh-oh, the equipment is too heavy, and the event is 1 hour away by bike. There is no basket on it, so there is no way I could carry it without killing my shoulders on the way. But how about cycling to the Central station, ~15 minutes, and not having to wait for a bus for 30 minutes on the way back here?
BOOM. The heaviest rainfall of the week was about to arrive in the exact timeframe when I was about to leave.
20 minutes of natural disaster, precisely from the moment I’m supposed to start pedaling. Congrats Murphy, you made it. I had to use option Z, which was public transport from A to B, all the way.
It took me 1,5 hours, but I made it.
On the bus, I tried to relax, breathe, and even meditate. My heart just wouldn’t chill.
If there is one thing I hate, it’s unnecessary sweating, and I constantly felt that mildly cold liquid in my armpits. Very, very irritating.
When I finally walked in the building, I quickly checked for the 9th time whether I still have everything, and placed all the toys in the corresponding pockets, so I wouldn’t have to bother with them in 20 minutes when I have to start my speech.
Before my time came, I quickly built up the stage, took off my socks, walked in front of everyone with bare feet and did this:
Practicing for TED Talks
The Wonders of The Body – 08.10.2020
If there was a way to bottle the amount of joy I felt during the speech, I could easily fill a thousand jars with it. It was the most phenomenal rush of adrenaline, mixed with happiness and inner peace. I was both calm and extremely hyped through the whole thing. Everyone from the audience was present, listening intently, waiting for the next move or the next trick. They didn’t miss a second of it, which makes it clear that the presentation was intriguing, exciting and entertaining for everyone watching it.
A solid sign that goal of the evening was very well achieved.
I know that the whole corona thing could make it very difficult to do it currently, but I strongly advise for anyone who is looking to improve their public speaking/communication skills to give Toastmasters a shot/visit, and discover the wonders of articulating your ideas and dreams in a way that captures the attention of everybody who is listening.
Take care and stay safe,
Erik
Bucket List Progress:
– Give a TED talk (#111)
Today I hit one of the biggest milestones of the year: I gave a speech in Dutch; my third language.
Ever since I was a kid, standing in front of a crowd of 20+ people wasn’t really a problem for me. I was always “the class clown” in school, and I really enjoyed it. Every single time when there was an opportunity to present myself, I took it. It was a chance to rebel openly, without being punished. Of course there were some limits, but just like with the law, there are loopholes I can play with if I’m creative.
My favorite classes were the ones where they gave us homework to make a PPT and present something you researched about a certain topic. As you can imagine, my goal was to make it as ridiculous as possible, but without being offensive or stepping over the boundaries – so it wouldn’t affect my grade.
It was that 5 minutes of fame that fueled my ambition to spend countless of hours on writing jokes, with the intention to make each and every person in the room laugh out loud.
When it came to presenting, I spared no time or effort in the pursuit of entertaining the people in front of me.
The strategy I used was the following:
1) Be the first one on the stage – so the attention of my classmates is still fresh, and they’re not distracted by the boringness of someone’s attitude of “just let me pass”, that made their whole presentation dry and soulless.
2) Volunteer right after a terrible one – so my performance would seem even funnier and more professional, thanks to the sharp contrast between mine and the last thing the audience just saw.
This way, it was easy to put up a show that always lead to intense laughter and general approval.
However, these speeches were done on my mother tongue [Hungarian], and even though my English is close to that level right now, it’s definitely not the case with Dutch.
That’s why it’s a wonderful opportunity to challenge my creativity and language skills at once. To make it even more difficult, the group I was presenting to was very diverse from the start. Not just in gender or age, but in profession, interests and taste for art.
My goal is almost always to be original and funny, while I convey an inspiring message. I can do that pretty well in Hungarian and in English, but the second I started writing it in Dutch, it became clear that I still have a lot to learn on this journey. It’s not just the fact that the writing process had to be done in a different language, but to remember it (under pressure, in front of everybody), use proper body language and pronounce the words correctly.
This project was very complex and challenging, which made it just as exciting.
One good technique I learned from a natural talent is to memorize what I want to say first [the text], and then – only then – start to add the other elements, like pauses, hand movements and facial expressions. The more layers, the more complicated it gets – the thinner your attention will spread, so it’s crucial to practice as much as you can.
So I began by reading it out loud, trying to polish my accent to sound rather like a native than a foreigner, figure out where to put the pauses, add the gestures and movements, and slowly put all the instruments in order, so they work together in harmony, the way a symphony is played by an orchestra in a theatre.
With a bit of caution, I printed the text to have something in my pocket in case I forget what I am supposed to say. When the time came I felt quite prepared, and the first few paragraphs were going well, until I suddenly forgot what’s next. My mind went blank. I didn’t panic, that’s why I had the piece of paper in my pocket, but it was quite disappointing that I stopped the “show” that was supposed to be fluent.
With the help of the notes in my hand I continued to deliver what was left, with only a few slips in pronunciation and misused phrases, but overall it was very satisfying to stand out there and conquer the challenge.
In the end, a storm of applause expressed everyone’s astonishment, since they weren’t aware that I was going to give the speech in their native language. It was a huge surprise for everyone, even for myself.
The feedback I received later was solid and easy to digest.
Most of them praised my accent, “it doesn’t at all sound like that you’re a foreigner, congrats!”
One particularly good one was about my approach to the whole process:
“Try not to memorize a whole text word-by-word, you’re making it very difficult for yourself. Instead, write a line about the aim of your speech; the message you want to convey – so if you get in trouble for forgetting what you were about to say, that sentence should help you come up with something in an instant.”
They were pleased and inspired, and I felt the same way.
The speech was about my struggle to learn a second language, and how I couldn’t speak a single word of German, even though I studied it for 8 years. Now here I was, almost fluent in Dutch and near perfect in English.
Let this be a reminder for everyone who tried and failed countlessly over the years, who thinks progress is impossible, and that the situation will never change.
Try another angle. Another approach, a different technique. Look at it from multiple perspectives.
Eventually you’ll find the road that leads to the place where you want to be.
Take care,
Erik
2020.09.10 – Day 598
Bucket List Progress:
– Master 5 languages (#2) [Hungarian, English, Dutch, Spanish, French]
– Give a TED talk (#111)
P.S.: Here is my speech:
Hoe vaak luister je naar je hart?
De kansen zijn, veel minder dan toen je een kind was.
Als kind, kun je alles doen.
Je kunt rare vragen stellen, zonder een gevoel van schaamte.
Zoals: Waarom heb ik twee ogen als ik maar één ding zie?
of waarom hebben krabben geen wenkbrauwen?
Je wilt de wereld om je heen ontdekken.
Wat gebeurt als ik mijn vingers in het stopcontact steek?
Of als ik stiekem legostukjes eet.
Je bent altijd nieuwsgierig, over alles wat om je heen is.
Maar in de loop van de jaren begonnen we onze curiositeit te verliezen.
Stukje bij beetje worden we volwassenen, en vergeten we hoe het voelt om een kind te zijn
Hoe vaak zie je een kind die zich gênant voelt voor zijn dromen? Of zijn ideeën?
Natuurlijk willen ze allemaal een astronaut, wetenschapper of piloot worden.
Want ze willen meer zien, meer weten en meer ontdekken.
Dat willen we allemaal. Nieuwe landen bezoeken, andere culturen leren kennen, bijzondere gerechten proeven. De gitaar spelen, een buitenlandse taal leren.
Gewoon, nieuwe ervaringen hebben.
Dat is één van onze grootse verlangens.
Toen ik 17 of 18 was, had ik helemaal geen idee over wat ik met mijn leven moest doen.
Maar het Leven stopt niet totdat je erachter komt, nee, je moet beslissingen nemen.
Ga je werken? Ga je verder studeren? Ga je een uitkeringstrekker worden?
Nou, ik wilde niet per se “niet werken”, maar ik wist dat ik zeker niet wilde studeren.
Dus, de derde optie… Nee, ik ben geen uitkeringstrekker, maar een dromer wel.
Ik wilde altijd een andere taal leren. In school heb ik voor bijna een decennium Duits geleerd.
Ik spreek het helemaal niet. Nog sterker, ik was zo dom met talen, dat mijn ouders elk jaar aan de lerares moesten smeken, dat zij me door laat, so I don’t have to repeat the year. Ik dacht dat ik gewoon autistisch was. Ik was blij dat ik mijn eigen taal kon spreken.
Maar ik gaf niet op. Ik begon om wat Engels te leren, deze keer bij mezelf. Zonder school, zonder al die onzin.
Na 3 of 4 jaar was ik bijna vloeiend.
Maar mijn hart wilde meer. Veel meer. Dus ik besloot om een derde taal te leren. Degene die jullie nu horen.
Mijn hart wilde ook andere culturen zien, ontdekken, begrijpen.
Maar in Hongarije dat kan niet. Het is gewoon onmogelijk om te sparen, naar buitenland te reizen.
Nou, we hebben geen geld voor reizen. Maar hoe zit het met verhuizen?
Een kleine kamer kost veel minder dan een AirBNB, en de banen betalen 4 of 5 keer meer dan in Hongarije. Dus, als ik hier kwam en een baan kreeg, zou het misschien lukken.
Twee vliegen in één klap. Een nieuwe cultuur, een nieuwe taal.
Een andere Land, veel meer opportuniteit.
Mijn hart wist het al, het is de juiste keuze.
Maar mijn hoofd, het was vol met “realistische” gedachten.
“Je kent niemand, je zult helemaal alleen zijn.”
“Je spreekt de taal niet. Als het duurt 4 jaar om een tweede taal te leren, hoe wil je een derde onder een paar maanden leren? Het is onmogelijk”
“Hoe wil je een baan vinden met je waardeloos Hongaarse papieren?”
“Je kunt niet je hele leven achter je laten. Je familie, je vrienden.”
Een kind heeft zo’n gedachten niet. Een kind hoort maar één ding: Wat zijn hart zegt.
Dus ik heb een one-way ticket naar Nederland gekocht.
Zonder iemand te kennen, zonder de taal te spreken, zonder een baan of een plaats te hebben waar ik kan slapen.
Maar ik had 4 maanden om deze dingen te oplossen.
Wellicht klinkt het gek, maar ik wist dat als ik mijn droom zou volgen, uiteindelijk alles goed zou komen.
Zoals jullie kunnen zien, het lukt, ik vond geluk.
Dit is wat er gebeurt als je naar je hart luistert.
Dank jullie wel.
Waking up early can be a wonderful thing, except when you barely had time to sleep.
Luckily a song from Burna Boy can make any ass shake. No matter the day, it’ll move that booty out of the sheets.
It was 6 am, and we were about to go for an early morning swim. When we arrived to de Waal beach, the idea of a quick workout became very tempting. Since many of us find cardio trainings repulsive, the most displeasing idea we could come up with was the famous stair workout, absolutely deadly.
It was so unbearably revolting, that I gave up at 2/3 of the way like a pussy.
I could blame it on the tiredness, my blood sugar, or the “impossible difficulty”, but the realty is:
It’s a mind game, and at that moment I was weak.
My courageous brothers fought it through all the way, conquering the steps of doom with both their mind and body.
The well deserved dip came after this, with a short meditation [+ Wim Hof breathing] before the water took us in. A bunch of seagulls were circling above the water, like eagles looking for snakes. They were loud, hungry and determined to mate. You could hear their war cries echoing on the whole beach, while the waves under them were licking the shores gently, curling the water on the wet sand carrying white foam and wooden sticks.
As we walked in the water, a sense of warmth started to run through my body, while the gulfs tossed my legs back and forth rhythmically. Ticklish thigh or not, we walked all the way until our feet sank in the softest mud. With the usual 3-2-1 go, we placed our buttocks next to our ankles, and let the current smooth out the last remaining stress hormones, until our minds were completely clear of any bullshit thoughts.
I could’ve sat there for hours, watching the sun rise up behind the Dutch mountains, allowing its rays to caress my face with all the love it has, even though we were 150 million kilometers apart.
When I walked out, I thanked them for making my 600th day begin with a beautiful sunrise and a company of real brothers in arms
As I pulled out my camera to make a snapshot, my friend pulled his pants off to change from wet to dry stuff. “Uh-oh”. No homo! No one wants to take a nude shot with a polaroid, dude.
*turns around until he is done*
With the magical sunrise reflecting on the river’s top, we angled the camera, balanced it on rocks, and took a photo of all three of us, with that wonderful background.
I jumped in just in time, but the photo turned out to be…quite alright.
As we dressed up, the wind brought us the smell of cinnamon buns, immediately impairing our ability to resist the Morning Market’s temptation. With a BJJ training starting at 10, we had to hurry a bit. But boy, was the market full of delicious snacks. Half the things I’ve seen I’ve never tasted. You haven’t seen ‘’exotic’’ until you’ve been at the Market in Nijmegen.
My Friend grabbed a couple of croissants, spiced nuts and dried mangos. That should last until we get home. We’ve had enough beauty for a whole month, and it wasn’t even 9 ‘o clock.
At one point towards the car, a barking snowball ran to my friend’s shoe, and started licking his ankle.
Nothing says ‘I love you’ more than a dogs tongue.
The second we made it home, we laid against the infamous flipped couch to recharge before the Martial Wars. Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu is a tough sport, and we just had a proper workout an hour ago. That is exactly the challenge a True Warrior would like to go through.
A quick shower, fresh clothes, and we were on the way to learn how to defend, attack and disarm.
Though it’s not really smart, I often spar with gorillas who are 30 kilos heavier and their experience is at least a year or more.
Do I stand a chance? Honestly, not at all.
But this makes you learn the techniques better than anyone, so you don’t rely on your bodyweight to “do the job”
Why would you struggle to execute a technique as gracefully as a ballerina, while you can just effortlessly twist an arm or sit on top, due to the huge difference in muscle mass?
In the long-term, it’s detrimental. But we’ll get to that, there are plenty of years ahead to learn and grow in BJJ and Martial Arts.
After a devastating session, a cold shower and a decent breakfast makes up for the countless chokes I’ve suffered. Your body is once again clean and filled with nutrition. The feeling is almost indescribable, it’s like dying and being reborn, except you do it every 48 hours.
What I didn’t know, is that we’ll get to spend time with 2 sweet little doggos, one of them was the size of 6 tennis balls.
They constantly tried to give “the look” to receive some treats at breakfast, but the heart of these adults were solid as a rock, and none of their hysterical barks could prevent us from enjoying our meal without giving a piece. [We are not evil, this food just simply wasn’t meant for puppies]
Next to the dogs, they brought one more thing: A cactus, which we’ll try to keep alive, at all costs.
We can’t afford to lose any more plants, it’d be a shame. We can do handstand pushups, but we can’t make plants survive for a few weeks? That has to change.
The degree of responsibility is graded by the level of difficulty in keeping alive certain things, starting with:
F) Yourself
D) Yourself + plant(s)
C) Yourself + plant(s) + low effort animal(s)
B) Yourself + plant(s) + high effort animal(s)
A) Yourself + plant(s) + low/high effort animal(s) + A kid.
A+) A multitude of all the above + dealing with another human being under the name of “Lover”, “Soul Mate” or “Spouse”
Currently I’m a D-, but I’m planning to get a C+ by the time I’m 25.
Luckily, in the next few hours I’ll get to taste the B- Life.
I jumped into my pink kimono with red devils on it, grabbed the longboard and skated right to a Lady, so we could take two dogs (Bo, alias Chonky Boi and Fleur, alias Hot dawg) for a walk.
The second I stepped in the door deafening barking ensued, with the two of them rushing towards me like the coyote against the road runner in Looney Tunes.
I simply placed the longboard in front of my ankle – so they couldn’t chew it off – until the Lady came to the rescue and made sure they chilled the fuck out. Once the collars were on, we were on the way towards the canal, taking them for a trip of a Lifetime [They are barely taken out]. Since I possess basically 0 experience in C+ levels, taking dogs for a walk wasn’t a part of my skillset. The only time I ever did it was probably on my very first date in 2015, and that was a disaster. It took less than 2 minutes until Chonky Boi jumped on one of the strangers. Now, I’m not the one to usually feel embarrassment, but the fact that it took less 120 seconds to mess up my task was quite a disappointment.
For the rest of the route, I was mildly worried that one of them would jump in front of a car if I didn’t pay attention to the leash’s length.
That didn’t turn out to be a threat, however, they constantly kept crossing each other like they were playing checkers.
The moment you untangled them, 5 seconds later our leashes were already in X again.
“Oh god, It’s only been like 15 minutes.” – I thought to myself
“How is it possible that people out there raise kids for more than 15 years without losing their shit?”
“Maybe I should buy more plants and level up from there.”
What a brief walk with the dogs can do to your consciousness.
When we got to a river bank next to a small forest, I began jumping up and down to demonstrate a point I can’t remember. A few harmless skips along the tracks, and we went forward like nothing happened.
5 minutes later an old Lady walks up behind us, asking whether a phone she’s just found could’ve fallen out of my pockets.
Holy. Fucking. Shit. It did. And we didn’t even hear a thing.
If this happened in Hungary, however, my phone would already be on sale with the title:
“I forgot my code so I’m selling my phone” or “For some reason I can’t unlock my phone, anyway for 300$ it’s yours”
Description: NoT sToLeN oF cOuRsE.
She didn’t have a cape, but she was a real hero(ine). This kind of honesty, kindness and decency made me fall in love with the country and the people. At home, this would’ve been a miracle, but here, it’s the right thing to do.
To exceed this euphoric joy, it was time to switch doggos. The long noodle was my responsibility for the rest of the road. Her pretty paws where hopping on the concrete with endless energy, tail wagging like the wiper of a windshield in a heavy autumn rain, sniffing and tracking down hidden treasures (such as the poop of another puppy) like an archeologist.
We wandered quite far from the house, and they were not trained for taking long distances without a break. At one point she became tired; less enthusiastic – so I picked her up and began carrying that cute tiny body for the last few minutes in the city. I was holding her like a bazooka, ready to shoot lethal barks at anyone who dared to frown at us.
At one point we noticed a vicious little fuck, yapping on max, jumping up and down on a windowsill, trying to assert dominance with its 400 grams. It was a Pomeranian, playing the big boy in diapers. Before we walked past, his quest to tear us apart (prevented by a 1 cm thick glass) made him push a vase off the edge of ledge, making the owner rush to the window and feel overwhelmed with surprise and embarrassment. You could see her mouthing “sorry” before she removed the four legged explosive ball of hair from the window and hid it behind the curtain.
We left with a laugh and a mild sense of pity – not all doggos are cute like the ones we were walking with.
When we arrived home, they basically passed out on the couch after the longest walk they’ve taken (probably) since the day they were born.
That was more than enough reason for us to do the same, but before, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:
The Award Winner Fruit Bowl
Frozen raspberry and mango, juicy apples, grapes (white or blue), a banana, walnuts, hazelnuts, cashew and dark chocolate to make sure it satisfies even the cravings of a mammoth.
The cashier took two long glimpses at my pink devil kimono before she printed out the bon1.
It’s always a pleasure to walk around in out-of-the-ordinary clothes. Or taking a banana for a walk, to make a point.
With such a nutritious fuel we began binge watching You S02, in her warm and cozy living room, until the evening reached its pinnacle, which I’d love to share with you – but the rest of my homework was eaten up by the doggos, thus it remains buried in a few of my cheeky neurons.
Take care, and don’t lose your phone or wallet while walking with pets.
Erik
2020.09.12 – Day 600
[Writer’s Notes]
[NL] Bon1 – Receipt [ENG]
Psychedelics in Public – In today’s episode:
Watching a movie [Tenet] in 4DX and half an hour of cycling in the evening.
Does that sound insane? You bet it is.
We went together with my roommate, so there’d be a sober friend just in case.
With an ice-cream in his left and an apple in his right, he jumped on his motorbike and rode all the way to the cinema by my side. To add a little more spice, we used the “Transformers Attach” maneuver on roads where the police couldn’t catch us in the act. He’d speed up as I grabbed his shoulder for acceleration assistance.
The result is a bicycle rolling with 30+km/h without pedaling a single round.
“Watch out, I don’t have breaks on mine” – comes the remark just in time, though we managed to get to the cinema without a scratch.
At 18:10 I began chewing 10 grams of Psilocybe Mexicana – That’s only 2/3 of the full package.
The movie was about to start in a few minutes, so I made sure they’re completely mushed before swallowing it, which made it easier for my (empty) stomach to digest it.
We settled in our chairs with my roommate and witnessed an ad from every single soft-drink company you can imagine. They were trying to sell us freedom, pleasure, peace. All these words have nothing to do with a can of ice-tea, but they made it look like it’s the one and only thing missing from our Lives to make it complete.
Such an artistic trickery, yet it’s capable of making billions of profit every year.
At this point I was about 20 minutes away before the shrooms would start to kick in.
I didn’t know what to expect honestly, most of the time we simply talk, listen to music, enjoy nature or meditate.
That’s a chill “shroom-routine”. No screens, no movies – just friendly company and comfy surroundings.
Today it was the exact opposite.
In the beginning it didn’t seem like a big deal. I was very absorbed in the events that were happening on the screen. The storyline, the view, the acting. I remember seeing the wrinkles subtly twitch. The expressions, the posture, the speech. All of them in harmony to make every single scene in the movie an absolute masterpiece.
The difficult part began after the effects started to reach their peak. It wasn’t just the shrooms, but the tension in the movie. The lights became intense, the chairs shook harder, constantly jabbing my kidneys with medium intensity, while my hair was blown by high-pressure air released from the head rest behind my ears. All of these impulses were coming endlessly, and my body didn’t have time to process any of it.
It was like dumping a truckload of Mentos into a huge pool of Cola, and then completely sealing the top.
Every nerve cell in my body was boiling, unable to release. I’ve never experienced anything like this.
At the occasional moments of chill, I’d take deep breaths to loosen up a bit, then shift my focus back to the screen. I swear, some of the scenes were so artistic, it felt like reality. Christopher Nolan made everyone in the audience fell in Love with the woman on the screen, root for the Hero with tight fists and falling tears.
No matter the cheesy lines or the clichés, it was one of the most impactful movies that’s ever been made.
When the movie was over, it was 21:30 and dark already. The air was cold, but not freezing. A temperature somewhere between 14-16 degrees. I wore shorts and a shirt only, that’s it. Could’ve brought a sweater, but I thought “it’ll be okay”.
The catch was that our home was 30 min cycling away.
I knew that I was able to bike safely, regardless that my brain was in another galaxy, but I still couldn’t get a moment of silence and peace. The number of impressions just kept growing, making my chest feel like a volcano that’s about to erupt and melt everything around it.
Before getting on the bike, I was trying to put everything in my bag safely. The flask of water I brought was somehow unable to go back in, until I turned the peaky edge of the cap with 90 degrees, then it smoothly slipped in. 5 minutes of struggling solved with the slightest shift.
“How many issues in Life could be solved in an instant with a small change in perspective”
I thought to myself, completely baffled by the impact of such a tiny twist.
When you are on shrooms, even the most insignificant things can bring you the deepest insights with intense meanings. They’re extremely powerful, yet brief and fleeting.
The moment we left the parking place, the evening view of a lake – dimly lit by the window lights of the houses surrounding it – completely took over me. The tiny frames in the distance were shining in white, gold, orange and everything in-between. In that jiff, it was the most wonderful view in the galaxy.
I tried to capture it, feel it, absorb it; but with every second of pedaling the view became less and less mesmerizing, until it completely vanished.
Was it the right thing? To keep cycling without stopping? That moment felt like a needle in a haystack I’ve been searching for years, and I simply let it slip away. That’s all there is? A moment of beauty so short-lived, that we don’t even get to enjoy it?
All these thoughts were flooding my brain, pushing me into an existential-crisis, until a few seconds later we arrived to the city and the cycle began to repeat: The sight was astonishing. Everything was extraordinary. The architecture of the houses, the lights on the street – even the smell of the wind.
That’s when I finally understood it. We can never stop time, nor will we ever control it.
We can spend a lifetime chasing an ideal – that perfect time, feeling or place. We can run through Life thinking that this one flawless instant will fill our hole and makes us feel complete.
Once we had it, we can use our remaining time to reminisce about our past glories; how fulfilling Life was when we’ve reached it.
The catch is: None of these are in the now, none of these are here.
That view of the lake was perfect, but it passed, and I cannot retrieve it.
So was that place in the city, until the next second came, and it was gone again for all eternity.
The only place we’ll ever find fulfillment is in the very moment we exist in.
At this point we were one minute away from a bridge, about to get a panorama view over the whole City. Before the last turn, a guy passed in front of us with a huge bouquet of flowers – it was the size of ~an adult husky.
“How strange” I thought
There are billions of lives, each of them with a unique set of problems, feelings and ideals.
One of them is about to fall in Love, the other is healing from a broken heart.
One has never picked up a guitar, the other has spent a whole Life playing songs.
A kid just lost his parents in a crash on the high road, while another couple was blessed with a child, even though they were told they could never conceive a baby on their own.
A man is about to achieve his first million, while another can barely afford to buy food.
One is brunette, the other is blonde.
A woman is struggling to get her math diploma, while the other is pursuing a degree in arts.
One is black, the other is white, some have a flawless physique, others are paralyzed for life.
An endless combination of issues, ideas and lifestyles, unique to every individual – buried or alive.
All of this on a tiny planet, lost in the ocean of endless stars.
Isn’t it something crazy to think about?
When we took the turn, my brother offered his shoulder to boost my bike, so we could use the speed of his small motorcycle and ride through the straight bridge with such a force that made the lamps’ lights melt and flow, just like the hyperspace jump in Star Wars.
I felt the wind play with my curly hair as we passed through, seeing our beautiful city in full, making this ride home a remarkable journey and unforgettable adventure.
The most interesting part was how we conjoined, working together with the accuracy of an atomic clock; two separate machines working as one, turning the wheel smoothly and in balance, without crashing and falling apart.
Life is so much more wonderful with friends who you can count on.
You can support, strengthen and push each other in the right direction.
Once you build a genuine connection with a strong foundation and a deep bond… Respect, nurture and appreciate it at every opportunity you’ve got – it’s one of the greatest treasures Life could ever bestow on us.
Seeing my friend with a body structure of a Greek God, sitting on a tiny scooter, trying to pull us uphill with the enthusiasm of a football fan, shouting from the top of his lungs: C’moooon! – until we made it to the top was the most hilarious thing I’ve witnessed in a long time. After a few minutes, both of us arrived – tired but unharmed.
This is the part where I say:
DISCLAIMER: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. [Or away from Home]
But honestly, you do whatever you want.
Just make sure to love more and hurt less while you do that.
Take care and good luck,
Erik
2020.09.16 – Day 604
“THIS IS IT!“
Crunchy Sweet Potatoes in Breadcrumb & Parmesan Coating.
Could anything be better on a Sunday evening?
I wrote the grocery list, jumped on the bike and rushed to the closest supermarket to fulfill my destiny.
It took me 30+ minutes of wandering to get 5 things.
At first, I was trying to do it alone; to “get familiar with the placement of things, so I’ll know where to go the next time I need something.”
After scanning through every shelf inch by inch, somehow I still couldn’t find what I needed.
Speaking a third language is one thing, but knowing the name of ingredients is another, trust me.
“Mag ik iets vragen?” [Can I ask something?] – I walked up to the store clerk next to me
– Natuurlijk [Of course] – he says with a smile and a warm blink
“Ik zoek naar paneermeel” [I’m looking for breadcrumbs]; nice question by the way.
He points it out on the exact shelf I was staring at for the last 10 minutes.
“Áh, dankjewel!” [Thank you!] But I still couldn’t see it
It took a long and awkward silence until my eyes finally stumbled upon the box of paneermeel.
I couldn’t have been more wrong when I thought that being clumsy starts at the process of cooking.
Alright, next item. Same shit, different minute.
I was gazing at every single label to find a specific cheese. 6 minutes passed, not a single Parmesan in the fridge.
“Mag ik iets vragen…”
The guy who said history repeats itself wasn’t joking.
Yet, with all this dedication to initiate a convo in Dutch, I can already see myself bargaining on a market to get better ingredients for harder recipes!
When I got home, I was delighted to find out that some of the eggs broke on the way; which is literally 400 meters/less than 2 minutes.
Everything was soaked in yolk, and I’m supposed to “enjoy the process” with a smile on my face.
Last time taught me how to deal with these: Just shut up and keep cooking.
That’s how you make a disaster into a fairly good dish.
After preparing all the ingredients, an aha moment revealed a tiny flaw in planning: There has to be something to dip these in; a sauce or cream. It hit me hard, and it hit me late.
“GARLIC!” A bright light bulb appears.
“Is it even possible to do home-made sauce out of garlic?” Google once again was the savior of the day.
According to 3 videos and 6 articles about sauce making: Definitely.
Lacking the right equipment? Nope, not really.
The thing is, we have to try anyway. If I wait until we have the perfect kitchen, I’ll never learn enough to become a [self-proclaimed] Chef; a Master of Cuisines.
The recipe said we need garlic, lemon, oil, salt and anything except a blender.
Luckily that’s exactly the only thing we had at home for such things.
Since the lemons were not planned, and thus missing, I asked my roommate to do a round 2 of groceries, while I prepare the potatoes for the evening.
Step 1) Slice them into fairly even pieces:
Step 2) Make the coating with the breadcrumbs, parmesan, oregano, garlic powder and pepper.
Step 3) One quick dip in the eggs, a firm roll in the bowl of crunchiness, and there you are, a baking sheet full of juicy pieces.
For some reason, this time the thought of failure wasn’t present.
The flavor might not be perfect, but I’m certain it won’t burn the house down, or end up completely inedible.
This feeling was the craziest, most unfamiliar from all of them.
After 23 years of being a master-disaster in the kitchen, I finally defeated the belief of being hopelessly retarded.
Alright, 30 minutes in the oven and let the real struggle begin.
Let’s peel the garlic and see whether imagination is indeed our only limit.
The video said I need a full cup of clovers, but
1) What does even a “cup” mean?
2) Why can’t they just use grams or millilitres like every other normal human being?
So I decided to peel half of what we had and blend it.
Long story short: It didn’t work, Google wasn’t kidding.
Time for Plan B: Hand blender.
It was slightly better, except that the pieces flew in every direction of the wind, defying gravity, along with every single physical law known to scientists. It went all over my face, eyes, panties – everywhere you wouldn’t want it, no matter how much I covered the bowl with my palm to prevent this from happening.
The best part is, after shooting them everywhere with a fighter jet’s velocity, it didn’t even end up creamy.
But oh boy, was it spicy. Death-Chili is a sweet candy compared to it. One micron of this garlic sauce could nuke an entire ant colony.
It was so strong, I could barely breathe after licking my fingers to test it.
Though I completely butchered the garlic, the potatoes turned out to be amazing.
This picture describes the results better than any word ever will:
It was warm, golden brown, crunchy and tasty.
Bon appetit/Jóétvágyat/Eet smakelijk!
Erik
28.06.2020 – Day 524
Bucket List Progress:
– Become a Chef: Make 1000 dishes (#52) – [1000/2]
PS: Kitchen aftermath, all victories come at a cost, even in cooking:
“I may or may not have fallen asleep”
The one sentence everyone wants to hear 20 minutes before a date.
For these things, it comes in handy to have a few friends who can be late with literal days – you end up getting pretty fortified against only a few minutes. Luckily, I’ve been well-trained on this field.
Though they still miss out on the opportunity to throw in a sassy “might be late but worth the wait”
The house was already outrageously neat, which is quite a feat for a Man Cave.
Yet, there is one thing we can’t really offer to our guests: A seat. Our couch is ∩dsᴉpǝ poʍu, which leaves the carpet the only place in the house where you can “comfortably” chill. This makes our home a little more unique, and there wasn’t a single person so far who had an issue with our design/taste:
After all, if you’re not sitting on the couch, you’re more likely to be productive. This is exactly what happened in the next 5 minutes: It was time to cook a proper dish.
Both of us agreed that our cooking skills are below average.
She can burn water, I can overcook it. You can imagine the rest, if this is how we deal with the simplest things. Nevertheless, I began chopping carrots, mushrooms and spinach leaves, mixed them in a pan with chili and black beans, cooked them on low heat for 10-15 minutes, and served them with baked onions for the touch of crunchiness and overall ultimate taste.
When I began to add salt somewhere in the middle of making this delicacy, she gently expressed her concerns for my spicing skills.
I mean, the measurement tool I use for spicing is my heart, not “twelve thimbles of salt” like in the American recipes, so it’s fair to assume that I have absolutely no clue what I’m doing.
20 minutes later when we put it to the test, the reality was that I fucking nailed it.
8/10 would cook again.
At this point we arrived to the pinnacle of the evening, when we began to open 3 decades old bottles of French wine to give our unemployed livers a job.
The first bottle’s cork I completely screwed up. Whether it was the lack of experience or simple bad luck, millions of crumbles flew everywhere around the kitchen and inside the bottle.
With the help of a sieve I filtered what I could, but it tasted like vinegar.
Drinking it would’ve been like letting a zombie give you a hug. Not smart. Not smart.
Since she speaks French, it seemed like a good idea to ask her to open the second one. You know how French people are. You better speak their language or you’re fucked. Perhaps it works the same way with their grape-gods, and only a worthy individual is allowed to open a bottle with a fairly intact juice that pampers our taste buds.
Lo and behold, she did it twice without missing her mark.
The setup was flawlessly good:
Smooth music with sunlight. A roomy balcony, food, board games, great company and some old ass wine.
We could discuss a hoe’s pros ‘n cons, partially selling our souls for a bigger bank account, the benefits of a chonky dog, our friend circles and their effects on us.
Time flew by and the moon switched places with the sun. That’s when the pancakes were about to come. She was so annoyed by how slow the process was, that the salt ended up not going into the dough. That brought the overall dishes made today in balance; I used “a loooot” and she used none.
The way she frowned at the pan still haunts my thoughts.
By the time the plate was full with female tortillas, she revealed that her favorite movie is also Interstellar. Thought she is a little more dedicated than I, with a fluff-ball hamster named Cooper and over 10 views in total.
We sat out again to finish the wine, spread some honey and sprinkle the blueberries + cinnamon combo on top of the gold medalist pancakes of the night.
At this moment you’d think that Life couldn’t be any better than that, that’s when we turned on Rick and Morty to further improve our involvement in the Hedonistic Arts.
It took one episode to realize that there is one last thing I could do to improve my TinderDates rating:
“I’m gonna check out your shoulders” – I say without smirking
She threw off her shoes in a blink. While I was setting up the bed, she was still busy enjoying grandpa Rick.
Now, here is some solid advice for giving a proper massage.
If you’re a complete beginner, this’ll give you an incredible boost to your skillset:
1) Make sure the environment is comfortable, safe and relaxing.
– Set up the bed in a place where no passing eyes can peek in from the street/a balcony. If the chance of being seen is there, they won’t be able to relax fully.
– Use the right intensity with light and music. A dim room with soft music is very pleasing; it makes it easier to give a heavenly experience, and it doesn’t cost you any extra effort to do it properly.
2) Focus on “giving” a massage, not on “doing” the massage.
– The biggest difference between a good massage and an incredible massage isn’t about the techniques, but the amount of attention and effort you put into giving the best experience you can to the person you’re massaging. Feel their response and adjust, don’t just go through the moves like you’d do with your grocery list.
– Always remain in contact. You can walk around the bed, move, or change angles if you will, but [at least one of] your warm hands should continuously stay on the area you’re massaging.
– Use variety. You can repeat moves, multiple times, but remember that you can also play with the amount of strength, speed, and surface you’re using. Use the bottom of your palm to apply decent pressure, then gently slide your fingers through the soft spots, this’ll make the whole experience a lot more colorful and exciting.
If you’ve never given a massage before, I can still guarantee that you can do a wonderful job just by using what’s written above.
And now, back to the Date:
I made mistake of letting Rick and Morty go on without turning it off, but I already started the massage, so I couldn’t lift my hands off of her clothes (Rule #2). Surely enough, this couldn’t go on through the whole session, so I broke a rule to fix another, and eventually managed to keep both.
Rick and Morty off, Lo-Fi on, let’s send them back to heaven where they belong.
The shoulder check happened to involve the back, then the arms, all the way to the fingers – which turned into doing the legs too, from the tiniest toes all the way to the buttocks.
She was so ticklish at one spot, that even a little pressure could make her twist and jump with giggles coming out of the pillow her head was resting on..
The moment I was done, she wasn’t quite sure which galaxy we were in at this point.
The 30 year old wine + Rick and Morty did a great job.
“That was more than just checking out my shoulders”
Oops.
It didn’t sound like a complaint tho.
She managed to crawl on the floor, lay on the carpet and use her jacket as a pillow – contemplating whether she should go to work tomorrow.
Tomorrow, as in to a meeting in 7 hours.
After a few minutes of struggle, she made herself function for another 15 minutes until she gets home, leaps in bed and probably damns her moral code for being responsible.
In the morning when I asked whether she made it to the office, the response was:
“Of course! My Mama didn’t raise a quitter”
Let’s hope her liver lives by the same principles.
Blue Star Dates EP1
2020.08.23 – Day 580
“He is smiling!” – One of the Ladies from the group stares at me.
I was lifting the massage bed over the balcony to help my neighbor after a heart surgery.
“Oh, jij doet massage? Nou kom maar!” – All of them starts laughing [“Oh, you can massage? Come come!”]
And I did. After finishing the treatment, I packed everything in and went straight to the other side of the street.
You’ve never heard old ladies scream like this.
One of them jumped out of the chair, questioning whether this is really happening.
It was really happening, so I opened the gates to set up the massage bed in the middle of the grill party.
“But how much is it?”
– Nothing! It’s free.
It’s a 60th wedding [Diamond] anniversary, they deserved a good evening.
The second she laid on the bed, dirty jokes were flying from every direction of the wind.
Some of them were way too difficult to translate, but one thing kept coming up viciously:
GRAB THOSE BOOTIES.
At one moment she slapped on my thigh and started to pull down my panties (Blindly, her face was buried)
When she lifted her head, the shock on her face was worth every penny.
It was still me, not her naughty friends switching places with me as she expected it.
What a delightful way to begin such a special evening.
Right after Round 1 they gave me a plate of food – fresh from the grill – until I prepared my hands to give another wave of pain relief.
A pretty lady in her early twenties (The Grandkid) flew out of her chair and jumped on the bed the second it was free.
If I knew massage is this popular among ladies, I should’ve advertised it the second I got my degree.
By now I’d probably already be married.
As they continued to drink champagne, I kept making everyone feel younger by 10+ years.
No matter how old, pretty, muscular or drunk they were, all of them got up with a satisfied smile on their face. Soon enough, I was almost done with everybody. That’s when they handed me whisky.
Most of them were too old to remember high-school English, but managed to communicate through Dunglish/Engtch.
They were loud and happy. A handful of champagnes were already consumed by the time I got there, and even more during my stay. Some of them were wasted to the point where they couldn’t stop singing, completely inaudibly, but who cares when your blood-alcohol level is as high as the Empire State Building.
They even went to do Conga on the street!
It was too good to be real.
Their hospitality was 10/10, and they were the ones who kept praising me.
At one moment, two full plates arrived with seemingly delicious pieces of strawberry-filled pancakes.
They were salmon rolls, though still very-very tasty. It made them a little more sober than they were previously; so I brought my Polaroid.
They grouped up in front of the balloon gate, and 1 2 3, I caught the perfect moment for their 60th anniversary:
These people deserve all the love we can give.
This is how a stranger from a foreign country became a beloved fellow on a pension-party.
To be honest, I was afraid. I was afraid that if I go over, they’d send me away. Because of corona, because I show up without being invited to the party, because of being a foreigner who doesn’t speak Dutch perfectly…The list goes on, these thoughts were crossing my mind constantly, trying to stop me, but my heart said I should walk there and try it.
The rest you’ve read already. That’s how you make wonderful memories.
When you choose the voice of your heart over the voice of your fears.
Take care,
Erik
Can you imagine being married for 60 years in the 21st century?
2020.07.22 – Day 548
PS: One guy at the party started to talk to me about how the financial elite manipulates the economy with puppet strings, while showing me a video of Reiki orgasm that is achieved through channeling energy in my Chakras, if I want it.
He had YouTube premium; when he locked the phone, the moaning loudly kept going.
What a fun evening, didn’t see that coming.
Road to a New Life 
